Between Heaven and Hell

Chapter 15

 

Between Heaven and Hell

Copyright © 2012 by Carla Meyer

All Rights Reserved

 

 

CHAPTER 15

 

Joey had no idea why he was doing what he was doing, but he felt alone and he needed someone to talk to. He had returned to the little white house over an hour ago, but Meredith still stood in the fields, gazing absent-mindedly at the fields that stretched out before her. He couldn’t talk to God either, because to him, it felt as though God was punishing him, even more so than Lucifer.

He stroked the brown leather cover of the empty journal he found in Giovanni’s belongings and thought back to his father. He had kept a journal throughout his life. Joey remembered how his father always excused himself after dinner and retreated to his study, and wrote in a brown leather-bound journal, similar to the one he held in his hands.

He had always thought it to be a silly habit, because he had a wife and a God to talk to, he had a family and he had friends. He had the ministry at the church and his colleagues at his work, where his father was a well-known architect in Illinois. He was surrounded by so many people, yet his father had felt he needed a journal to listen to his deepest thoughts, his fears and desires, his sins and his good deeds. And now, Joey needed his father’s silly convention to pour out his thoughts and feelings, his hidden secrets of desires and fears.

He opened the journal onto a blank page, and for long moments, Joey merely stared at it, the pen held firmly in his right hand. He took a deep breath and glanced out of the window towards Meredith, and began to write.

 

 

 

                                                                                        September 14th, 2012

I am between Heaven and Hell.

 

I don’t understand the strange turn my once normal life had taken. It all seems so surreal, as though I am living a life of a fictional character, as though I am haunted by a never ending nightmare of fear, of guilt, of uncertainty. I had thought that all of this had happened because Meredith and I were meant to be together, but the girl standing out in the fields, the girl with the cerise eyes, the mammoth of white and cerise tipped Wings, the girl with the blinding Aura, isn’t the girl I thought her to be, no; she is my Guardian Angel.

 

And I, well, I am the son of Lucifer.

 

But I am also still Joey Olsen, still the boy who died innocently in a car accident, still the boy who didn’t want to make the deal with Lucifer, still the boy with the hopes of being half the man his father had been. I am still me, yet everything has changed. I am in love with my Guardian Angel, and I can only hope she comes to her senses, I can only pray, no not pray, trust that she opens her eyes and sees what I see, because the world isn’t what I had grown up to belief it was. In the world I live in, I fear Angels and laugh at the feeble attempts of Lucifer trying to get me over on the dark side.