Unclaimed

Chapter Fifteen

Lily's extensive examination of me had been completed and she'd heard the entire story of my dream with Luke. She had checked my mark, my skin, and my eyes. She checked to see if there was any leftover magic still in me, and checked for spirits hanging around me. She sighed, turning to look at Alpha Grady. "I'd like to have a few moments of privacy with Charli."

He looked at me like he wanted to question it, but he fixed his face and nodded. "Okay. I'll be right downstairs. If you need me, just shout." He leaned over me on the bed and kissed my forehead, then shut the bedroom door behind him after he walked out.

Lily's eyes looked faraway as she met my gaze. "Charli, it's not great news. It's difficult and complex, but I want you to understand that I will help you as much as I can."

"Am I okay?" She hadn't really said anything that meant anything yet, which made me nervous. Lily and I didn't normally spend time beating around the bush.

"You are," she said carefully. "You're not in any danger. I just wanted to tell you this privately, because you have to make a choice of whether you want to go through with all this. I thought you might want a little time to think about it on your own."

"A choice? Go through with what?"

"The only way to figure out what all was taken from you by the other witches, would be to make you remember it all," Lily explained with a purposefully blank expression on her face. You would have to survive it all over again. Some of it could be extremely painful. In fact, probably a lot of it would be. I imagine they took it from you for a reason, and I won't be able to bring you out of it. If I put you into a spell like that, you have to fight your way through it, to the end."

"But I would know everything?"  Memories were worth a little pain.

"It might change everything you know about yourself." Unable to hide her feelings, Lily's face looked sad and maybe even a little scared. "It would change everything you know about your life. They changed your memories. They took away parts of you that might've made you a different person. Memories with your mate? Those tend to be pretty emotional. It might change who you are, how you act, how you perceive where you are now."

"It could change how I feel." Nausea choked me. My first thought was Grady. What if I remembered everything about myself and lost Grady because of it? "Can I think about it? Do I have to decide now?"

She looked away from me, again. I knew she was being honest, but I think the bomb she had to drop on me was too much to bear. "Your mark is fading because you chose Alpha Grady over your memories of Luke."

When I called for Grady in the dream, I had chosen Grady over Luke. I hadn't known I was doing it until after I woke up. "How do you know that?"

"I heard... whispers growing up about a witch who cast a memory spell on a wolf and bound the memories to their mate's mark. So, every time Luke comes to you in a dream and you choose Grady, a piece of it will fade. You're letting him go. When it's gone, the memories will be lost forever."

"What the fuck?" I shouted, louder than I'd meant to. "So I have to pick one. I either pick the memories of the boy who loved me so much he died for me-" my eye twitched as my voice broke, "or Grady."

The door creaked open and Grady stepped halfway through. He must've heard me shouting because he looked nervous. "Are you okay? Why are you crying?"

The world started to spin and I thought for a moment I might pass out again. "It's just not the news I hoped for. I'm okay," I whispered to him. Then, to Lily I said, "I'll... let you know what I decide."

"Decide about what?" Grady asked, stepping completely into the room as Lily stepped out with a wave.

"I'm not going to tell you," I said as softly as I could manage.