The Weightless One

Alive But

Individual therapy

I know her name

Ella like a fairy tale

Princess in her no-

Nonsense clothes

She sets fake tea

In front of me and

Says straight away

Marina

Is not dead

She can't tell me more,

But let's talk about what

It meant for me to see

Marina

Have a heart attack

I didn't know what was happening

I should have done something

First

It was not your fault.

We sit for a minute with just that.

It feels like my fault,

I was with her,

I talked to her,

I held her hand

And I didn't know?

When you have an eating

Disorder for a long time,

Let's say years, your heart

Can get weak.

Sometimes we can get better

Sometimes our heart can't take

It,

This is the reality of the path

You're walking

My therapist

Pulls out my chart again

With its low this and low that

And we talk about my heart

And this time

This time I listen.