Fight It

Chapter 9

It was my shift to stay up. Christina was fast asleep, Tris was still in the infirmary. I felt alone. I never truly was alone, but in this moment, I've never felt more alone.

I was an Erudite transfer. I was training to become a protector of this city. But along this journey, I've had to suffer the loss of my parents. My parents would never love me. I betrayed them, their faction.

I did it to become the better me. The me who I've wanted to be ever since childhood. I've wanted to jump off of a barrelling train, shoot a gun and throw knives like the Dauntless. Here I am.

I've lost some friendships here at Dauntless too. Ever since Edward's stabbing, I'm fairly sure Peter told everyone it was me who did it. Will and Al have stopped talking to me, but Tris and Christina knew that it was Peter too.

I've gained more friends here than I had at Erudite. Dauntless is where I belong, but my aptitude tests tell me otherwise. I belong in all factions. And those people who belong in all factions are hunted down and murdered for being different. That's why Angela -- and Grayson -- told me not to tell anyone.

Grayson is a whole other story. Some days he could stare at me for ages and other days he'd want nothing to do with me. He was polite about it, but it still made me confused. What do I have to be confused about? He invited me to live with him for a night so I could get more sleep. How gentlemanly was that?

I stopped my mind from thinking and opened my eyes to look around the room. There were nine sleeping bodies on different cots across the room. Drew, Molly and Peter all slept in one corner, Edward and Myra slept in the opposite corner, and Tris, Christina, Will, Al and I slept near the doors.

I heard footsteps outside of our dorm. I quickly turned over and watched the three people on the opposite side of the door, when one turned the knob and burst through, abruptly turning on the lights. I closed my eyes and then sat up in bed, wearing a tank top and my tight pants. They keep giving us more clothes every day which is nice.

"Wake up, initiates!" Eric bellowed in the room. He clanked something against the end of my bed. "Don't you look dazzling."

I rolled my eyes. "Why, thank you," I said to him with a smirk, probably not a great idea challenging him at the hour.

"Train leaves in thirty minutes! Be there," Four said to us in a less menacing voice, looking over us, his eyes stopping at Tris' empty bed, then turning to walk out of the room.

Eric clanked the same thing against my bed again. His shoulder touched Grayson's as he walked out. Grayson's eyes watched Eric leave, then glanced back at me. He followed both men out, shutting the door behind him.

I turned my head to my left and two beds over, Christina laid there still fast asleep. "Christina!" I shouted at her.

She jolted up a bit and shook her head. "Its not morning yet, is it?"

I chuckled and threw my blankets to the end of my cot. I stuck my feet into my boots and quickly laced them up. I grabbed a sweater and then stood up. "Come on, Chris," I said, looming over her, "You're going to be late again."

***

We got on the train a few minutes ago. This time I could actually run as fast as it and hop in without stumbling. I leaned against the opposite wall staring at the ground. Once I caught my breath, I took a look around and saw that the Dauntless-born initates have joined us.

Christina and Will had informed me before we left that Tris wouldn't be coming back to finish training. Eric said she was out. If Tris got her head out of the clouds, she could be really good. She was small and fast, if only she used that to her advantage.