TW: suicide attempt
national suicide hotline: 800-273-TALK
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els pov:
I put my phone down, why did Mike text me?
A few hours pass and I am still sitting at home, wondering if I need friends.
If I need anyone.
That's when it hit me.
"I don't want to fucking live anymore." I laugh through sobs.
I've gone a year without cutting but, I guess that stops forever tonight.
Mike and his friends seem alright, but people aren't good for me, we've seen how that ends for me.
"Guess I'm ending it." I whisper under my breath, whilst looking for the spot I think it my razors a year ago.
As I find them in the back of a picture frame, I remember.
I grab it and then it hits me.
Notes. I can't leave my siblings hanging like that.
I get out my journal and wrote down a note explaining all my problems to Will, I wrote a little something for Holly when she's older but in the note to Will, I included to just tell her it was a normal passing.
Now my one to the school. Everyone in it, Fuckers.
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Dear Society, It's El Jane Hopper.
It's probably your first time hearing my name, unless you've already heard of my passing.
You might've heard it on a article about my brother, but it probably went in one ear and out the other.
I'm coming clean today.
In 2018, I was pregnant with James Dante's baby. It wasn't meaningless sex though, he drugged me. The reason I'm not known as the teen mom of the school is because I had a miscarriage, 2nd trimester. I wasn't even hiding it though. I'm already invisible to the public eye.
Now, I know you won't believe me because he is the king of Hawkins high, but it won't matter anyways, I'll be in heaven or hell and I won't hear a damn word that comes out of your mouth.
Also, if you feel any sorrow after I do this, shut the fuck up. Don't walk around the school saying, 'she was angel, such a sweet girl' because nobody knew me. Don't decorate my locker, or put up suicide prevention signs. I'm going to be happy now.
So you know what society.
You suck, Fuck you.
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That's it I believe.
I put the note for Will next to me, and take a deep breath. 'Is this selfish?' 'Will anyone even care?' 'Who will find me?' "SHUT THE FUCK UP." I say and continue.
I next copy and pasted the note into Snapchat, Instagram and Facebook so everyone can see it.
I grab my razors and cut, cut and cut.
I'm not getting weaker. It's not working.
Soon Will is going to see the post and stop me.
"Fuck!" I mutter.
I look around and see some painkillers on my dresser.
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There is another chapter for y'all.
It's going to get darker than this, I'm really sorry I guess this is almost a vent chapter.
Word count: 506
YOU ARE READING
WHEN WE COLLIDED // mileven
Fanfictionplease ignore this book i wrote it when i was twelve when two people are broken, they help each other because, they know the pain they re going through. - They were living two totally different lives, they went to the same school their entire lives...
