Lure To The Woods

VI

For the second time in the past week, I sprinted all the way home. My feet slapped against the concrete rhythmically, my breathing laboured. I was scared to check behind me, in case he was following. I couldn't hear anything, so I was praying to the universe that he had decided not to follow me. 

I jumped over my garden fence, crashing to the ground on the other side. I hit the ground hard, knocking the air out of myself. That was probably not a wise move on my behalf. I groaned, rolling over slowly. I cursed to myself, crawling out of the flower beds while trying to steady my breathing. 

I hobbled over to my drain pipe, leaning against the wall for a second. I wasn't in any state to climb that thing right now and the guy was nowhere to be seen. I kicked off the shoes I had taken from the back door, rubbing my chest to make it feel better. I had seriously winded myself with that James Bond move- launching myself over the fence; I don't think Bond would have almost knocked himself out, though. 

I felt slightly uncomfortable on the ground, since my only escape would be up the drain pipe (which I couldn't climb as fast as I usually would). I decided I would relax quicker if I was off the ground floor, so I mustered up the courage to climb up the pipe- ignoring the aches in my body from falling over twice today. I shimmied across the window ledge, leaning through my window to grab my baccy. 

Obviously I have my priorities straight. 

 I took a seat on the widow sill, rolling a fag and looking out across the forest. The twins and I used to spend a lot of time in the woods, talking all night. It's honestly so tranquil in there- since there's no cars- and the deeper you go, the people disappear too. I liked being surrounded by trees and plants, not a soul in sight. Now, I would be stupid to go in there alone. I just wanted my freedom back.

My hands were still shaking and my thoughts were all over the place, so I felt pretty strange about everything happening. I felt safer now that there was some distance between the stranger and I, but he was still there somewhere. I could feel it. I peered through the dark, trying to spot him amongst the tall branches and thick trunks. 

There he was. 

At the end of the garden- hiding in the tree line- stood the source of my problems. He wasn't moving, so I stayed put too. Like I said, I felt a lot safer than before- now there was distance between us. If he came any closer, however, I wasn't afraid of using my damn lighter to set my curtains on fire and throwing them at him. I lifted my cigarette to my lips, lighting it and inhaling deeply. 

He was watching my every move and I was watching his. 

I didn't feel like running and screaming for help. I knew he wouldn't hurt me, but I wanted to get as far away as possible from him for other reasons. Those reasons being feelings I couldn't explain. I could tell that he didn't mean to scare me, but I felt so conflicted. I should be screaming bloody murder, not trusting a stalker because of a gut feeling. Maybe Heather was right- I'm losing it. 

The feelings inside me were overwhelmingly strong. I felt so stressed. I hadn't ever felt attraction like this, which was very confusing for me. Not only was I crazily attracted to a man, but he also happened to be stalking me. Why was it that I was attracted to him and nobody else? That makes zero sense to me. Why couldn't I just be normal and not like a stalker? I felt like screaming at him, but it would most likely wake my mum up. 

I finished my ciggie, stubbing the bud in my ashtray. I swung my legs into my room, closing the window. I wanted real answers and now. I wasn't stupid enough to have a face to face conversation with a stalker, though. I would have to communicate with him in a different way.