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Hate Me

TW:
Crying, yelling, tell me if I missed any!

"We need to talk."

"N-no, we don't...it, it, won't happen again. It was just an occasional nightmare thing it's nothing out of the ordinary..." Peter tried to lie.

Tony sighed, pulling him into another hug. Peter was stiff at first but had to get comfortable since Tony didn't let go for a little bit of time. When he did finally let go Peter realized Tony had glossy eyes.

"Are you okay?" Peter half whispers. Tony nods, wiping his eyes.

"You just...you just don't deserve this. Any of that stuff you went through." He said. Steve put a hand on Tony's shoulder then on Peter's.

"Peter, I think you need to talk to someone." He said.

"Everyone keeps saying that but what do you expect me to do? Just walk up to someone and rant about all the things that happened, I don't need someone to have to deal with that." Peter said, raising his voice slightly.

"Your not bugging anyone with it. And your not just waking up to someone. We're here right now to talk. For anything, we want to help." Steve said, giving Peter's shoulder a comforting squeeze.

"How will that help? How can anyone help? It won't work! It never works! People only ever make it worse!" Peter exclaimed, unable to hold in his emotions any longer.

Tony and Steve flinched, never seeing this side of him hardly ever.Peter never lashed out like this before.

'Look what you've done. Now their scared of you. Now they pity you. You messed everything up just like you normally do.' The voice whispered to him.

Peter wrapped his arms around himself , trying to contain his tears.

"Why is it so incredibly hard to talk to people about these things? For normal people they can say their few problems, get comfort, then go on with their lives!" Peter continued, his world going blurry.

"So I should be able to do that too, right? Wrong." His tears ran down his face.

"Because I'm not normal, I know that! I'm barely even human! And it's so hard to remember the person I used to be, the person I was before everything else happened. But of coarse at the same time I always remember the bad things. And don't you say, focus on the positive-what positive?" Peter went from his voice being loud, nearly yelling, to a quiet whisper.

"Just because Hydra doesn't have handcuffs or chains on me doesn't mean I don't have any of  my own." He said, this sentence being the quietest of them all.

Steve and Tony didn't know what to do other then allow Peter to get this off his chest.

"I-I just don't get why you guys don't just, Just..." Peter's voice trailed off.

"Just what, Peter?" Steve inquired, sadly. Peter has forgotten they were there, just listening, because of how quiet they had been.

"Just...hate me." Peter finished, after much debate in his mind.

To his surprise he was engulfed into another hug. Steve ran his hands through Peter's hair, trying to calm him down.

He didn't know he needed this, he thought talking to someone would make things worse but things seemed to be getting better.

"I-I'm sorry-" Peter cried into Steve's shoulder clutching onto him for dear life.

"Shh, Shh, we're sorry. For not helping you sooner. We're sorry for not being there when you needed us." Steve said, shushing him.