Letters || TaeJin ✔

44. Notebook

Taehyung

It's been a week. It will be a lie if I will not admit that Jin's absence has been bothering me. He's not going out of the restobar's kitchen and I haven't seen his friend Hoseok as well. After the incident when Jimin scolded Jin, I haven't seen a glimpse of Jin since then.

I dared to ask Jimin once and he told me that Jin requested to assign him to the back office and is currently busy. I tried messaging and even calling him but to no avail. I can feel it, Jin has been avoiding me and it's making me worry.

Lately, the food Jimin has been giving me isn't that interesting. It's delicious but it tastes like restaurant food. Unlike before when the foods tasted like home.

"Are you and Jin going out?" I asked Yoongi who is currently preparing a report. I sat on the chair in front of his table as I scan the documents scattered all over his desk.

Yoongi closed his laptop and stared at me. "We're friends."

"What does it mean?"

"We're friends so I don't think it's wrong if we will go out, right?" Yoongi's smiled at me and I don't know why his smile feels like he's trying to annoy me.

I took a deep breath. My heart is pounding hard under my chest. It's been a week since I've been trying so hard to focus on Jimin but what's harder is forcing myself to something that I don't really want.

"He's not replying to my messages. I haven't seen him in a while. I'm just worried because the last time I saw him, Jimin scolded him." I reasoned out. I am feeling somewhat guilty about what happened.

"Did you ask Jimin?" Yoongi asked, leaning his back on his swivel chair.

"He said Jin requested to be transferred at the back office."

Yoongi smirked. "I see. So, what's going on between you and Jimin? Sorry, I've been busy lately and I think we haven't talked in a while."

I agreed. In the past week, we only talk about work. I will go out to eat lunch at Chim's and will go back to the office after an hour or two. Yoongi has his own schedules and he is usually occupied with work.

"He visits every night to bring food. But it tastes a bit different lately. I don't know why or maybe I'm just too tired of work."

Yoongi nodded. "So you and he are officially dating?"

Yoongi's question caught me off guard. The truth has been killing me inside. "I'm not sure."

Yoongi chuckled. "You're not sure? So you mean you're unsure of your feelings for him?"

I bit the insides of my cheek. I looked down, ashamed to tell the truth.

"You keep on telling me the past few weeks that you think you're falling for the person writing the letters, right?"

As weird as it may sound, but Yoongi is right. So I nodded.

"And his delicious cookings made you fall for him more, correct?"

He is right again so I nodded again.

"Well, I guess you're feelings did not fail you."

I think for a while. I did not get what Yoongi meant. "I'm sorry. But I guess it failed me. I know this is not right and I am feeling guilty about this but I only see Jimin as a friend. And it's weird. I know I told you that I think I am falling for the writer and the cook but I guess I'm wrong. I don't know. I don't understand my feelings too.

The past few weeks had been weird. The spark was lost. The food isn't tasty anymore. He's not giving me letters and I'm not looking forward to dinner. He's also acting weird for the past three days. When I asked him if there's a problem, he will immediately get so clingy."

Yoongi chuckled annoyingly while opening his drawer. He then tossed a red notebook in front of me, making me puzzled.

"What's this?" I asked while staring at the notebook.

"Why don't you open it and look for yourself?" Yoongi raised an eyebrow at me.

I picked up the notebook and opened it. The first page has Jin's picture. He looked so young. Perhaps, it was taken during high school. As I browse the notes, I remembered what Jin told me the last time we went for a stroll. He said he loves to doodle sweet notes.

The messages in the letters that I received are here. As I browse more, the menu plan is written at the back part of the notebook. I felt like my world crashing. My head wanted to burst. My hands began to shake.

"When I got that, I remembered the letter that Jimin first gave you. If you noticed, I've been asking you every time about the letter and the food.

If you will compare, the pattern is obvious. The first letter goes with the number one menu, the second letter goes with the second. When I got hold of that notebook, it messed up the pattern. Because obviously, what he will write and what he will cook for you were all planned beforehand. Did you notice that?"

My chest tightened and my stomach felt funny. It felt like thousands of needles are being pushed on the tips of my fingers and toes.

"It's Jin. It's Jin who was doing all the works. It's all Jimin's idea but the letters, the foods, it was Jin. He's the one who thought and wrote of the sweet notes and he's the one who planned and cooked the menu. So I guess you're right. Your feelings did not fail you. Right?"

I cannot speak. I can't believe Jimin deceived me. That's the reason why something isn't right. That's the reason why his handwriting is different from the ones in the letters.

"And the reason why the foods weren't as delicious and homey as before is that Jin's not the one cooking for Jimin now."

I looked at Yoongi. "Because he's now assigned in the backroom."

Yoongi shook his head, leaning forward and resting his arms on his desk. "Jimin fired Jin last week. And Hoseok quitted that's why they are not in Chim's anymore. Hoseok told me that Jimin hurt Jin and he accused him of being a flirt and a gold digger. If you will ask me, Jin doesn't want to answer my calls too. I went to his apartment once and he's not there. One of their neighbors told me that he's working in a recycling yard."

It felt like my heart and stomach are being squeezed. Yeonjun told me that he saw Jin last week delivering newspapers and he has bruises on the face and arms. Jin told him it's from an accident. Now it's clear to me.

Jimin kept on calling me that night. I turned my phone off. I don't know how to face him. I am angry. I felt betrayed. I looked stupid. I can't believe I let him deceived me.

I felt sorry for Jin. Maybe he did not want it too. Yoongi was right, my feelings did not betray me. I fell for the right person.

It seemed like the weather can feel my feelings too. It's raining hard outside the coffee shop where I am spending my night. Wasting time to be exact. I don't want to go home. I stared at my phone, hoping that Jin will reply to one of my messages. But none.

I looked at my watch and its already 10 in the evening. As much as I want to spend it in a club or have a drink somewhere, the rain is so hard and I guess it's a sign that I needed to go home before the streets get flooded.

I went out of the shop and a guy crouched on the stairs of the cafe caught my attention. His clothes soaking wet from the rain and his whole body shaking probably because of the cold weather. But what bothers me the most is he's crying hard.

I tap his shoulder to get his attention but he shoved my hand.

"Don't touch me!! Go away!" He screamed as if he's so scared. He is scared and he is shaking in fear.

"J-jin?"

***

AN

Errors I'll fix later

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