Silence and Tears

11

After taking the tray to the canteen Alex went to the common room where he found Georgie, "hello stranger! Not seen you in a while" Georgie laughed as Alex sat down, "sorry I've not said hi yet. I went to check on perrie when I first arrived expecting her to be asleep but she was up and dressed so I stayed with her" Alex explained, "it's fine, that's what I thought, hows she been so far?" Georgie asked. "She's been alright. She cried when she saw me this morning and ran to give me a hug" Alex smiled, "she has really missed you al. She kept telling me how much she missed you". "I missed her too. So much" Alex said. "Jade told me by the way, just thought you should know but I promise I won't tell anyone else" Georgie said, "I don't know what to do G. I could get in so much trouble but I can't help my feelings" Alex sighed, "I think if you really feel that strongly and you think there might be something there you need to tell her, she might be feeling the same you never know" Georgie explained, "I guess so. She's the sort of girl I want to take home to my parents. I just know they'd love her" he said, "sounds to me like you think there's something there. Just go for it Al, she really likes you it's just a question of whether she feels the same" Georgie suggested, " I think you're right G. Do I wait though, a little bit. We've only know each other a week and a bit, do you not think it seems rushed?" Alex asked, "you've known each other a week and a bit but you've practically spent every day together pretty much constantly, the only time you're apart is a couple of hours at night. That's like a lifetime of knowing each other for some people" Georgie said. "I really don't know whether to tell her or not. If she doesn't feel the same it could push her progress right back" alex said, "Alex. I'm not telling you what you should and shouldn't do, but the way she talks about you is lovely to see, you don't talk of someone like that if you're not really fond of them" Georgie explained. "Thanks G. I think I might just know what to do" alex smiled. He walked off to the office as quickly as possible, he wanted to phone Jonnie now so he could hopefully go back to perrie with some good news. He flicked through her files to find jonnies contact details,
J: "hello"
A: "hi Jonnie it's alex"
J: "hiya, everything alright?"
A: "yeah great actually. I've spoken to perrie and she said she would love for you to visit tomorrow if that's still ok with you"
J: "really, oh great! I'll definitely come down, what times best?"
A: "probably around 1pm, she'll have had her lunch by then so I can free up the afternoon to give you a bit of time"
J: "that'd be great, does she need anything bringing in? Clothes or anything?"
A: "she could do with a few jackets or longer tops, most of hers are cropped and it can get quite cold in here"
J: "no problem I'll sort some out to bring. Also I don't know why she didn't take it with her but she's got a little teddy that mum got her when she was young. She couldn't sleep without it so the first night she's not had it with her would've been the first night she was in there"
A: "she's welcome to have it in her room if you bring it along and she wants it. She has been having trouble sleeping some nights so it might help her a little"
J: "yeah I'll bring it with me, has she mentioned anything else?"
A: "she asked if Caitlin would be coming with you"
J: "yeah she will, she's not working and she's really missing her so she said she'll come along"
A: "ok, that's perfect. Thanks mate, I'll see you tomorrow yeah"
J: "thanks Alex, bye"

Alex smiled as he put the phone down and headed back to perries room, he couldn't wait to tell her and see how happy it made her. He walked back to her room as quickly as possible and sat down on the bed next to her when he got there, "you ok?" He asked, perrie nodded and smiled. "Good, I've got some news for you" he said, "Jonnie and Caitlin are both coming to visit tomorrow afternoon". Perrie smiled happily and leant into alex giving him a hug, "no way! Thank you so much". "They're both looking forward to seeing you and they miss you a lot" alex said, "thank you Alex! Thank you so much" perrie said happily, Alex smiled and wrapped his arms around her, enjoying the hug that she was giving him. They sat like this for a while before alex spoke up. "You give good hugs you know" he smiled, "so do you, the best" perrie laughed, "what do I talk to Jonnie and Caitlin about tomorrow? I've not seen them in so long" she said her mood suddenly changing, "whatever you want to, they'll probably have lots to ask you though after not seeing you for so long so try not to worry" Alex said, "what if they ask something and I don't know what to say?". "I'll be there as well, I can help you out if you need me to. Also they're your brother and sister, I don't think they'll take offence I think they're both just excited to see you" Alex explained. "Thank you for organising it, I really miss them both so it'll be nice to see them" Perrie smiled a little, "it's no problem, I've not spoken to Caitlin but your brother seems like a great guy" Alex said, "he's brilliant, he used to sing with us sometimes as well, he's got a really good voice" perrie smiled, "can everyone in your family sing?" Alex asked, "mam could, really well. She used to sing in pubs and stuff when I was young. Dad can sing quite well but he doesn't, he only sang when we were young to get us to sleep, he started saying it was a waste of time when I was about 8. And Jonnie and I both love to sing, well did love to" perrie sighed, "hey remember what I said. One day it will feel right, you'll be able to sing and think of all the good times you had with your mum" alex said. "I hope so". Alex could see perrie getting a little bit upset and wanted to cheer her up as best he could, "perrie, why don't you do some drawing for a while until it's time to get your tea?" He suggested hoping it would take her mind off things, "okay" perrie said quietly, she stood up and walked over to the table grabbing her sketchbook on the way, Alex joined her only seconds later to sit opposite her. "Can I write a letter to Jonnie and Caitlin? Just in case there's anything I forget to say to them tomorrow?" Perrie asked, "of course you can" alex smiled, perrie nodded and started writing, she would write for a few minutes and then pause for a while. Alex didn't look once at what she was writing, it wasn't any of his business, besides he was to busy looking at perrie and admiring her features. He knew he needed to tell her how he felt but it was so unprofessional of him to even think about telling her he loves her. Perrie was writing for what seemed like ages and when she was finally done she folded the paper up and wrote Jonnie and caitlins names on the front.

A few hours later perrie had just finished her tea, "still wanna go for a little walk?" Alex asked, perrie nodded happily and slipped her shoes on, "come on then, I'll bring a blanket and we can sit outside for a while" alex smiled as he took hold of perries hand. They walked slowly through the corridor taking advantage of how quiet it was since most people would stay in their rooms after tea time. Alex could tell perrie was still extremely anxious every time they walked through the corridors so was always cautious to pick times he knew would be quieter than normal. They soon made it to the door and went outside, it was just starting to go dark so there was still some sunlight peeking through. They sat on the same bench they always sit on and Alex carefully placed the blanket over the two of them before putting one arm around perrie and letting her rest her head on his shoulder. "It's a nice night" perrie said, "it's lovely, so peaceful" alex agreed, "I used to sit outside in the dark with my dog, we had a swing seat on the garden and he'd always curl up on my knee when it was dark outside" perrie smiled, "really? I quite often sit outside with my dogs, though they don't tend to curl up on my knee too much, Leo does like to sleep with his head on my thigh" alex laughed a little, "I miss Hatchi so much" perrie frowned, "you'll see him soon, you're doing so well already and anyway I'm sure he's missing you too" alex explained, "thank you" perrie sighed, "what for? I've not done anything" alex said puzzled. Perrie sat up a little bit and looked into alex eyes, "for being so amazing all the time. You always know what to do or say to make me feel better, and you always try to make me feel better no matter what. I don't think anyone's cared for me this much since mam died, you're the only one who's been this good to me despite how awful things can get sometimes" perrie said quickly, "you always say you've done nothing but you make me so much happier everyday and I don't know what I'd do without you and you always tell me how amazing I'm doing but without you I wouldn't be doing so well, and you don't give yourself the credit you deserve because in reality you're so much more amazing than I am, you have to be to be able to help me in the way you have and I know I've still got a long way to go but with you by my side I know no matter how shit I feel and how bad the day is that everything will be ok and I will come through stronger and happier" she added before taking a deep breath, "I really do mean it and I don't think I've ever said this much all in one go or ever opened up this much to someone else but I just feel like you've been there my whole life, the way you always know what to say makes it feel like you know my story and exactly what I'm going through when really I've not even been able to tell you everything yet and it's just amazing how wonderful you are really".

Alex stares at perrie in astonishment if the amount of words she'd just said in one go, "thank you perrie. I really don't know what to say but I'm so glad you can see you're improving because you really are and I'm so proud of you for facing every challenge with bravery because I know how hard some things have become for you over the last few years. It makes me so happy to hear you say such lovely things because I really do enjoy the time I spend with you and I do feel like we've been friends for years. You're an amazing girl and you have such a great personality and I'm glad that you're starting to show that even more" alex replied. "It's really nice spending time out here with just you, I feel so safe and happy. I just want to feel this way forever really" perrie smiled looking into Alex's eyes, he turned to face her again after looking around and immediately made eye contact which neither of them were keen to break. It felt like years they were staring into each other's eyes but it was an intimate and caring and new feeling which they both enjoyed. Perrie was the first one to speak up after a few minutes of this.

"Alex, I think I love you"

Sorry if the next few updates are a little bit slower, I rewrote this chapter three times to get it to how I wanted it so I'm taking some time to rethink the next few chapters and make sure everything id planned for them fits into the changes that I've made in this chapter. Also sorry for the cliffhanger xx