I don't know.

Maybe that's why I can't understand him.

It still doesn't make sense why he wants to spend almost a year of his life being near me, the girl who is equally at fault as the drunk truck driver for his brother's death.

I close my eyes, the soft breeze like a gentle touch, caressing my skin, its fingers running through my hair.

I am the reason for my best friend's death.

The thought rings like a sickening bell in my head, causing a deep pang of pain shoot through me. More like a knife being stabbed into my heart and then twisting the handle.

I sit there, hugging my knees to myself, as the thoughts slip away and I'm left staring blankly at the city that is alive with movements.

The vibration in my pocket breaks the prolonged moment. I shift as I fish my phone out of my pocket.

Surprised to see a group facetime, I look around and sigh. I hold my phone in an angle that wouldn't reveal the wall behind me, the last thing I want is for my family to find out I'm not okay.

I plaster the biggest smile on my face and receive the videocall.

My phone's screen divides into four parts for mom, dad, Theo, and I.

"Hi," I say as enthusiastically as I can.

The three of them greet me with the same energy. I notice mom and dad both are still in the hospital, in their own rooms. Theo is in his own apartment.

"How's the trip so far?" Theo asks.

I smile and reply, "It's been great,"

"Dad said you had work to do so you're staying mostly in your room," Theo says and I nod.

"Honey, when are you planning to come back?" Mom immediately asks.

I look at the part where her tired face is, she pushes her glasses up and looks at me intently.

"I told you mom, I'm going to travel for a whole year."

"But if you're staying in your room and doing work, what's the difference, New York or Geneva." Theo jumps in.

"I think we've talked about this already, there's no point in repeating these things," dad sharply says, making Theo frown.

"So, Eleanor, anything special or any news?" Dad asks.

I smile at him gratefully. I open my mouth to say 'nothing' but then it crosses my mind. I have to tell them about Adrien, Arianna, and Dylan.

For a moment I consider not telling them, but if either of them happens to find it out somehow, it won't end well.

"I met one of my..." my voice trails down as I try to choose the right word, "friends," I settle on saying.

Theo instantly narrows his eyes, but mom and dad smile, encouraging me to continue. I take a deep breath and continue.

"And... you guys know him. We've decided to travel together with his friends who I know from back in high school,"

"Him?" Mom interjects.

"Yes,"

"Who?" Dad curiously asks.

"Adrien,"

"Well that's not very specific," Theo says with irritation.

I roll my eyes, "Clark,"

He furrows his brows, narrowing his green eyes, and then suddenly nods, "Jaceon Clark's brother?"

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