May 24, 2020: 7:42am-8:15am
For anyone who is struggling, struggling, struggling, like I was. Wanting to curse God for putting you here the way you are and feeling betrayed and distant from the world around you. I just have one thing to say. Let life do the hard work for you. It is already in motion anyway, and all of that resistance to the flow of things will only cause a greater struggle to ensue. As Eckhart Tolle would say, "Accept each moment as if you had chosen it yourself." Everything you encounter here has one purpose, and is to wake you up from the dreaming mind. To remember that your essence is already perfect and pristine at this very moment. It is not as a result of some future event that you will suddenly become perfect. That is how the mind thinks, though, that it must study hard and once it has enough knowledge then that is when enlightenment will come. It is that very quest which will keep you from looking at what is already inside of you, and inside of me, and inside of trees and bugs and squirrels and birds. It was the attainment of knowledge which caused me to repeatedly misdiagnose myself as enlightened and subsequently feel even more awful when I realized that I cannot stop my suffering. And that is the whole point of it, to remove your suffering.
Once, when a monk asked Siddhartha Gautama, "What is the quickest way to find enlightenment?" The Buddha responded, "Focus on your breath." The monk was confused, "Is it really so simple?" And the answer is yes, because when you focus on your breathing, you are no longer transfixed on your thoughts. Even for just a second, that space within you is known. That space is the Buddha nature that we all share within us and without.
So, in reality, you don't "become" enlightened, you just allow the light that was always there to shine unhindered by the clouds of the mind.
It is the light of love. That which holds the planets without force. It is the invisible awareness which is the very source that allows visible light to be made manifest. It has no form and no limitation. If something exists, it is in the presence of love.
Thank you.
YOU ARE READING
Infinite Love: A Diary of Remembrance
SpiritualContent warning: There are sections of writing in this book which contain references to suicidal ideation, self-harm, hallucinations and delusions both psychotic and neurotic. The writing within this book is the direct writing from my day-to-day di...
