Open Heart: Second Year {On Halt}

Chapter 16- Leap of faith

(CAUTION: CHAPTER CONTAINS TRAUMA TRIGGERING SCENES)

Dread fluttered in my stomach as I stood in front of the elevator.

My stomach rolled uneasily, constantly--angry and anxious. My hands were clammy with sweat which broke across my skin everywhere. Inside my chest, my heart still pounded noisily-- has been pounding for quite a while now, almost too loud against my ear.

Not because I was standing in front of the elevator.

No. Because it has finally gnawed upon me that there were some matters where I was absolutely helpless. And Dr. Thorne gave a practical exemplary of it.

I forced myself to not remember what he had shown me...his words against my ears, full of malice and threats, oh, conjured with anger so deadly that it would consume anyone in the path. I had no idea what kind of man he was...what kind of mind he carried.

How did I miss him during my intern year?

I licked my dry lips and waited for the car to arrive because there was only one way to forget what happened few moments ago. I needed a petrifying experience to make me forget that. I really needed to forget than and just go on. I could do this. All I needed to do was take a step into the elevator and mark it six floors below to the atrium. I would watch the doors close, shut my eyes while inside the closed but moving confinement until it slid opened.

All I have to do was remember falling to my near-death and take that feeling to counter my current fright. I could do this. I allowed the memories to blemish me.

The elevator stopped. I peered at the floor and found that there weren't none. The lights started going off and on and then the steadied. But then...Instead of descending the elevator started ascending. I frowned. A technical error perhaps.

I needed to do this because if I don't, I would break into tears any moment. Thorne's voice pierced through suddenly.

"You see her...she has been like that for thirteen years, her case is drug but I can make your--"

No!

Do not think about that.

Don't dare to think about that.

I pressed my hands to my temples, content that they weren't moist but bothered that headache was attacking me again. The mar must have triggered it.

It could go to the nearest floor above but almost five more floors? The lights began blinking again and my heart thumped against my chest. A sense of claustrophobia gripped me and I pressed the buttons of my designated floor again and again and again.

The elevator car arrived slowly, taunting my patience and grip on the tears but I managed to keep it at bay. When the doors slid open, it was empty inside. I sighed, a raucous sound.

I frantically banged the door and kept pressing the buttons, the emergency, the stoppage, the slider, but it didn't budge. Tears of fear ran down and I beat my hand against the door and shouted for help. The lights steadied again.

But I found myself unable to take a step inside. I was frozen.

I rarely used elevators outside, and that too with someone serving as the wing-pal to make sure the cables never willingly snapped. But I never used the elevator in the hospital. Ever....but today I needed to. I have to!

And the elevator shuddered. Once...twice and then it dropped down! My body lifted up!

"Get the hell inside, Charlotte Turner." I snapped myself and forced my legs to move. They were shaking just like my whole body, ending with deathly fisted hands. But I have to...I have to so that I can forget. I have to forget what I saw and heard.