On my way to stardom

38. KCON LA

Oh, so they've printed their own posters of me and are giving out to fans for free! They are also permitted by BigHit to sell other merchandise including albums and T-shirts. I've been putting off the project of designing a light stick just like other idols for a long time but there have been more and more requests online for me to do it, so I better get working soon...

'Ahhhh!' The boy standing right next to me shrieks. 

Oh dear. I thought I've pulled my hat down enough. Oh well, there's no point hiding from the people that love me.

'Annyeonghaseyo,' I greet him and more and more friends turn around to look at me.

'Sh...Sha...' he is struggling to say my name which is extremely funny. 

'I'm Shannon.' I smile, 'nice to meet all of you.'

None of them speak. 

Is it just me or my fans are more mortified than excited to see me everytime I turn up? I swear the fans of other idols are always so hyper and are ready to jump on them. 

I start laughing as they are struggling to find words. I guess seeing me so relaxed also puts them to ease because smiles are slowly appearing on their faces.

'Welcome to your official American fan club!' One of the helpers at the booth says.

'Thank you so much, you are all doing such a great job,' I tell them.

Another helper starts weeping after hearing my compliment. I feel so bad for making her cry so I go over the booth to give her a hug. 'I'm so sorry to make you cry.'

She shakes her head and says, 'I'm just so happy to meet you, Shannon. You've inspired me so much.'

'Me too,' so many fans also say. 

'You've worked so hard for your debut even though you had no experience in performing on stage at all but you've managed to establish what you've achieved in less than a year.' She continues. 'You've inspired me to work hard for my college application and I finally got accepted into Stanford.'

'Wow, that's very impressive!' I tell her. 'I'm so proud of you and thank you, for choosing me as your inspiration. It's the greatest honor to be loved by all of you STARS, truly.'

I think I'm starting to cry as well, but I manage to hold it back.

I might also have broken a few rules about not taking pictures with fans in public but I've told them not to post them online except for the autographs I gave them. I trust them.

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There's half an hour left until I head onstage. I think the group called Stray Kids is on now. Apparently they are under the same label as GOT7.

I've changed into my stage outfit and this time Freddie oppa has gone with a slightly sexier look. 'It's America, girl. Everyone's sexy out here,' he said, which I kinda doubt.

He's got me a baby blue satin mini dress. Although it's got a cowl neckline there's a crisscross pattern at the back so it feels really secured on me, no accidental slips for sure. I've also received a bomber jacket from the fan club just now so I thought I'd throw it on for the first song to show some gratitude for my fan's support.'

I'm sure the STARS will also be glad to know that I've fought to let the combat boots shine again onstage. There are so many memes online about my obsession with them and I'm totally not mad about them.

I still find those stages that elevate you up from backstage to the stage super scary. But that's how they want me to enter the spotlight so I'll just do it. 

'Thank you so much, LA!' I can hear Tanya and her group saying goodbye to the audience which is the cue for me to go on. 

Before the music starts I already shout, 'L.A. LEMME HEAR YOU SCREAM!'

I just love dramatic entrances.

The whole audience is now hollering for me. I'm sure there are people who didn't come to KCON for me but they're still screaming on the top of their lungs, which is exactly the vibe I love performing to.

The first song is, of course, my debut track, "Ticket."

No matter how many times I've already performed it, it's still one of my favorites to sing and dance to. Namjoon oppa really created a legendary song for me.

This time, we also did the dance break at the end of the song. Now that my leg is completely healed, I can finally do the acrobatic flip! 

As soon as the last note of 'Ticket' is played, the next song comes up. 

It's a song called 'Caged days', which, may or may not have been a song about Dad... It's one of the B-side tracks in the new album. I even got questions about the context of the song during the press conference for the album, but I brushed it off like a pro.

I used the strongest base and beats to create a feeling of despair and an insane electric guitar solo for the bridge. The lyrics for the last chorus of the song has a 360-degree change where I can finally stand up against the negative feelings and tell them to come at me. 

It's pretty intense and I was really tempted to make it the title track of my first comeback but luckily I came up with an even better song that earned me my triple win.

But this is all just the beginning of the journey.

'SOLIJILEO!'