Worthless [DISCONTINUED]

Chapter 17: N I G H T M A R E

[a dreadful dream accompanies with a feeling of helplessness]

Another sleepless night.

Jon knew without a doubt that something was bothering Sonya ever since her quarterly meeting in Jacksonville. The man had become a light sleeper for years now, and every sob he could hear as she got out of a horrible nightmare only breaks his heart more than anything.

For the first two night, he had tried to comfort her, questioning her about what her nightmare was all about, all of which were brushed off and often she snapped at him in anger. Now on the ninth night, he finally had enough and he can't keep seeing her like this.

"You can't always keep this from me, Princess." He whispered taking her by surprise.

With her back turned to him, he moved himself until he was now above him, caging her with his arms and legs. He wasn't going to hurt her, he promised himself never to intentionally hurt her and he's not going to break that promise now. He simply stared at the tear stained features of the woman he had married.

In the silence of what he knew was hours after midnight, the sound of her light sobs echoed their bedroom, even the sounds of the static of the baby monitor couldn't cover the fear in her sobs.

"What happened in the meeting?" he knew it all started when the meeting began. She wasn't this miserable while they were on the phone moments before it began. A part of him wanted to question Tony about it, as unprofessional as it may sound for him to do. His wife was miserable and no matter what he does to have her open up, she wasn't budging.

"I'm fine." She muttered, it was the constant answer in the bed, when they get up, and when they were spending time with Sam as a tear would fall from her eyes out of the blue.

"Bullshit." He spat, his left hand now taking hold of her chin, making her turn to look at him. "I've given you nine days to try telling me what's wrong. This has gotten too far."

He watched her in silence, but her eyes turn glassier against the moonlight illuminating through the windows. Her lips quivering as she tried holding off another sob. Sonya's hands now raising and landing on his chest, fingers clutching onto the shirt he had on.

"Talk to me." he begged. "I can't keep seeing you like this. I promised to protect you, but how can I? I don't even know what I'm protecting you from."

It was desperation more than anything.

"I love you." His words was a mantra he tries to live day by day, not just for himself, but for her and for their daughter. He loves them more than anything else in this world, more than his love for the profession they had chosen. If she had asked him to retire in this very moment, he would do it, he would knowing it would make her happy, he'll do something else, make something of himself somewhere else if that's what he needs to do to make her happy.

"I'm scared." She barely whispered. Her arms now wrapped around his torso. Fingers digging onto his back, as her sobs now grows louder. "I'm so scared they'll come and get you and Sam away from me."

With his elbows now resting on either side of her, he cupped her face against his hands, thumbs wiping the tears that continue to fall from her cheeks.

"I'm scared that if we continue the case against John, he'll come for you and Sam. I'm so scared Steph and my family will use it to get to me, to use you and Sam."

He tensed at the revelation coming from but he simply continued listening to her, to her fears, to her self-doubts, her self-loathing for everything that came to being someone of her position. He had listen to the growing doubt everyone in the meeting has had because of what her past had made her, how she couldn't separate work from her personal life, more so now that she was married to him, it creates doubt about a bias as well.

He moved himself once again until he was laying on his back before pulling Sonya on top of his chest. He wrapped her into his arms as she sobbed the weight that continues to crush into her shoulders. He doesn't know what he could say to make her feel better, how to make this better when he knew the possibility of it happening once again.

"I'm so scared too." Jon finally confessed when Sonya had calmed down, with only her sniffing sounding in their bedroom. Both of them had talk about the implication of their separation but never much about how the extent had affected them both, severely. "I could care less about what Ro and Seth would think of me after what I did all those years ago, but it didn't mean I didn't regret doing it. To see you so miserable because of what I've done, because of what they had me do. I'm scared that they have something else against you that they would try to use against me and make me choose all over again."

As much as he promised her he would never hide things like this from her, he knew he would do it all over again if it meant protecting her from the cruel world, from the world that never knew about what she had to go through to be the woman she was today. He wanted to do everything he can to protect her, to protect Sam, to protect the family they finally had. It was cruel for the world to have to put them back in such a situation but he would still do it nonetheless.

"But every single time that fear comes to mind, I look at you, I look at Sam. I look at the thing I can possibly lose if it ever comes to it. I know we can work something out. We have everyone behind us, as much doubt as they have against us, it's in their best interest they have at heart. Your son, as much as he's got his own life right now, will always be there for you and for Sam as much as possible."

It was the assurance she needs, as false as they could be when the time does come.

"I don't know if I can face him again with everything going on." Sonya whispered, finger lightly drawing circles on his chest. "I can't face him knowing he would have my sister's help, knowing they'd disregard everything I've gone through since losing the baby."

"But you got me. You got that British lawyer of yours. We'll do anything and everything to make sure you get the justice you finally deserve. We may not be able to fight WWE, but we can fight your own battles for our future."

It was one of the only reasons. It was for their future, as much as they would try to deny facing this part of their lives, they needed to face some of it, to pave a path for themselves for the future, without the darkness that had actually loomed in their life.

"The court proceeding is in a few months." She whispered.

"And I'll ask time off if I need to." His immediate response made his wife glare at him.

"Jon, you practically work only on AEW on Wednesday and just a few days in a month for tours in Japan." She reminded.

"So?" he challenged her, unafraid of the scolding he'll get for saying this, "I'm married to the boss, so I think I can do whatever the hell I want." He smirked catching her hand before it landed on his cheek. "And I still got good catch."

"You're an idiot." She shook her head, the first smile in a long while. "Thank you, for still being here even after seeing how moody I've become because of this."

He rolled his eyes, hands now resting on her ass, pulling her closer to him and accidentally having her hit his member in the process. He winced making her laugh in the process.

"I'm still here even after you've done nothing but hurt me."

She giggled lifting herself up by her elbows. She took the moment to stare at him and he took the time himself to stare right back at her. The chaos of the world doesn't matter as long as they had each other. Even as unstable moments had been, they had each other to fight each other's demons.

"I still love you either way." Jon added finally after a moment of silence between them.

"I love you too, so much." She whispered leaning forward until their lips met in a kiss

This was what both of them needed, the moment to forget, to be themselves and forget everything else in-between them. The kiss that took his breath away and made him realize that behind all the façade she had about being this ruthless business woman was something more than only he was able to see.

He kissed her like he never kissed anyone before. It was his reassurance for the better or worse of what life could throw at them from now on. The nightmare that keeps them up at night means nothing when they got each other.