VII

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*Trigger Warning: In this chapter suicide will be sortly mentioned.*

One. One. Two. Right hook. Duck. Jab. Harder. Again. One. Quick step back. Again. Punch harder. There, an opening. I punched right in the ribs.

Before Dee could finish his swing that was aimed at my face, I dodged. Dee went to grab my shoulders, but again I was faster. I quickly pushed his arm ups towards the sky by his elbows and dropped my level. I stepped between his legs and pushed my shoulder into his stomach. From there I made quick work and took Dee down, securing him in place. All the air was pushed out of his lungs and he groaned. Although he was stronger, I was faster and could use his own weight against him. With a tight lock I held him down until he tapped out.

"Damn." Dee groaned, gripping his ribs. "You punch hard, Ellis." I extended my hand and helped him stand up. Once again he groaned. I let go of his hand before he was fully standing, causing him to fall back to the ground. As I walked towards the edge of the boxing ring I heard a loud thud and a yelp of surprise.

"What did you do that for?" He asked me indignantly. I turned and looked down at him as I sipped my water. Then I started imitating his groaning, only I made it sound more like whining than groaning. "You were being a baby." I said. Dee looked hurt as he pushed himself to his feet.

"Now you hurt more than my ribs." He pouted, rubbing his side.

"What, your pride too?" I asked with an innocent voice. Dee shot me a hateful look and I grinned. I emptied my water bottle with a few long swigs.

"Good session. Imma head out, are you closing off?" I asked almost out of breath from drinking so fast. I took off the fighting gloves and gave them to Dee, who was going to put them away. Dee and I were trainers here at the boxing studio, meaning we could train by ourselves as well after working hours. I bumped fists with Dee as goodbye and walked to the women's locker room. Before you reached the locker room, you had to walk past the entrance. The studio was officially closed, so I didn't expect anyone by the entrance. But a male figure pushed at the door, which was still unlocked, and walked in. He took off his hood which was pulled up against the rain and shook out his hair. Our eyes met and I groaned internally.

Nate never came here. That's particularly why I liked it. This was my place to retreat to. I didn't want him nor my mother here and they knew that. But that didn't seem to stop Nate from coming when I ignored him for days on end.

See; five years is a long time. Things changed over time and moreover, I changed. Maybe Nate didn't have control over his illness when we were younger, but the situation certainly took away my high school years. I was young and stupid and scared to lose my brother. Of course I stayed with him. But now that he was better, because of me, I didn't owe him shit. I could do what I wanted and I did. It wasn't my problem that he nor my mother understood why all of a sudden I had wanted to move to the other side of the country to go to college, away from them. I wanted to start over, make a life that was completely my own so I could drown myself in all the delightful sins the world had to offer, as well as get a good degree. Nate and I fought many times. He just couldn't understand why I lost my sense of empathy, why it didn't bother me if I hurt him or our mother. I didn't bother to explain because I would never be believed.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him uncivilly. I saw him grinding his teeth before relaxing his jaw.

"I need to talk to you. You were ignoring my calls and weren't at your apartment." Nate declared, crossing his arms tightly over his chest. His expression was sour and he looked ready to fight me.

"So that makes it OK for you to come here?" I asked as I started walking again towards the women's locker room. Nate didn't seem to care that he wasn't female and walking right after me into the room. He pushed at the door I tried to slam in his face.

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