Memories from Another Time

Goodbye to you My Senpai

"Why are you running away from them?"

"I can't ruin their special day just because of my immaturity"

I saw the corner where Ed and I would usually sit in. Running towards the admin hallway and reaching the second floor where one of the most useless library resides.

I grabbed a chair nearby and placed it in a location where the view was perfect. Where the stage and the students I know and love could be seen. The speakers blasted the Graduation March on loop for the last time for this batch. I watched everybody as they marched professionally with the parents being supportive audience watching and feeling proud of their offsprings.

"Keine Aquino"

An unexpected student to graduate but happened anyways.

"Bard dela Vega"

A know-it-all, only child who needs some love.

"Chelly Prado"

One of the smallest seniors but cute.

"Robin Dela Cruz"

A love struck optimistic person.

"Zairen Lim"

The most perfect person I was able to get to know during my stay in this crappy school.

"Medusa Canovas"

A spoiled and toxic snake who can't even mind their own business. Nevertheless, chill with me as long as she won't hurt Sahya again.

After the parade, the school got a bunch of guest speakers. Inspiring but boring, the usual speeches you'd hear. Makes you wonder if they're following one format. When it was time to get the certificates, I saw everybody going up the stage one by one.

"Zairen Lim", the aura of not being completely satisfied surrounded him. He walked and gave a smile for the camera then went down. I was so proud of everybody finishing their high school years today.

After they sang their graduation song, the ceremony was practically finished. I ran downstairs and went towards him but heard a whisper screaming,

"Stop. Don't ruin this"

I took a step back and saw him turn my way. I looked back and walked the other way. I sat down in the island, watching him take selfies with his friends. Chelly and the gang, as well as Jimog. I saw his face smiling and yet not supported by emotions. An empty smile, a hollow one making it feel like something was wrong.

I was tempted to talk to him but I couldn't. A big barrier was separating us further and further. It seems like I couldn't reach him anymore.

I walked away and looked back for the last time, but seeing his laugh, I decided to go. I wanted to finally say the words that were digging knives into my heart but failing anyways.

I went back to the hallway where we first met and slowly leaned and sat down on the floor. The area where I usually see us playing a game of chess drifted into nothing. The only thing left there in that exact location was a blue and green butterfly whispering the words,

"I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough".

"Next year is another school year where I won't see you again"

"Another year without you"

"A year of going to the pepsi tables without seeing everyone"

"A year of being tortured and being alone once again"

"I'm sorry for loving you"

"I'm sorry for being like this"

"I'm sorry for never saying my goodbye"

"I'm sorry for being a coward"

"I hope this reaches you"

"I will wait for you to fulfill your promise"

"You're promise of always returning"

"You can count on me always"

"Congratulations my first love"

"I love you"

"Never left without saying goodbye"