Dead to me // Colby Brock

022 • 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗻 𝗪𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝘀

I looked at myself in Colby's bathroom mirror taking in everything I was wearing. Andrea had given me one of her old sweatpants that she apparently doesn't wear anymore and Colby had given me one of his hoodies, to which I looked like I was drowning in.

I looked so skinny in them.

Being skinny has always been one of my biggest insecurities growing up. Even though it's supposed to be a good thing and people "wish they were me," in my opinion, there are way more cons than pros.

David had always told me it was normal but he didn't see what I saw. He didn't have to deal with people calling you a stick because your t-shirt was tight around your arms making them look like a lot thinner than they actually are or people calling you anorexic because your rib cage would poke out when you had laid down.

I had never told David that any of this was happening and how people's comments had made me feel. I didn't want to stress him out.

His way to protective.

"Hey, Ava can I come in and get something real quick" I hear Jeff say softly knocking on the bathroom door.

No

"Yeah" I say back unlocking the door to reveal Jeff standing shirtless. He awkwardly smiles at me, walking past and going over to the medicine cabinet.

His back had four massive scratches going across it, all four of them looking look it was blistering up.

"The fuck what happened to your back" I question walking over to him. He places two pain killers into his mouth, turning on the tap and cupping the water into his hands before gulping down the water.

"It's nothing Ava" he replies back, his tone cold as he wipes his mouth.

"Well let me clean whatever that is" I say waiting for him to deny it but instead he just huffs.

"Don't put anything on it just clean it up" he grumbles. I grab a towel that was hanging over a basket before walking past him and placing it underneath the running cold water.

"Turn around" I say drying off the towel in the sink before walking over to Jeff. I focus on the cut on his back noticing that it was recent blood since I've had to stay with drunk Zane before.

"Why are you doing this" he questions me as I grab the wet towel and drag it around the cut, not wanting to irritate it. Jeff flinches, pulling his hand into a tight fist.

"Because" I whisper running the towel underneath the water again watching the clear water turn into red.

"But I was so shit to you" he adds on as he focuses on his tight fist taking everything in. I've noticed Jeff had done that a lot when we had dated.

"Jeff I've got bigger problems in my life right now, do you really think I care, I'm in a fucking gang" I say laughing but he doesn't laugh back.

"I never wanted to break up with you Ava" he says. I keep the towel underneath the water as I try and find what to say.

"Then why did you" I question him removing the towel and placing it on his back making him flinch at my touch.

"When I heard you were talking to Colby I was scared you would find out that I'm in a gang and of course knowing you, you probably would try and get me out. That's why I was so brutal I didn't want you to come back"

"Oh" was the only thing that I could say. He never actually wanted to break up with me.
Something about that made me feel comfortable in a way.

"Well yeah" he says turning around and facing me, his dark brown hair falling onto his eyes.

"That's kinda caring" I smile "hurtful but caring" I add on making him laugh.

"I'm happy your here" He adds on smiling at me. I knew what he was doing. I know this type of smile.

His flirting.

"Same" I say smiling down at the floor not wanting to make eye contact with him. For some reason I meant it.

"I still like you Ava" he whispers making my heartbeat start to rise. Please don't let this be real.

"Oh" I whisper back. I don't know how to feel about Jeff. I've been through so much with him and somehow I still feel safe and happy with him.

"Mm" he says placing his hand on my checks making me look up to him, my eye meeting with his. A smirk grows across his face as his eyes trail down to my lips.

Oh no

He leans closer my heart pounding in my heart. I didn't wanna move. I didn't wanna pull away. This felt too real. I felt everything come to me at once.

Rules number 4!

Rules number 4 Ava!

"Ow, what the fuck was that for!" Jeff grows at me and before he places his hand to his check I've realized that I've slapped him.

"Rule number 4" I say placing my hand beside me.

"What?" He questions me rubbing his cheek.

"Rules number 4 Jeff, if one of us breaks the other person's heart and comes back and either begs for them back or tries and kisses them the other person has permission to slap the other person" I whisper not knowing what Jeff was going to do next. I've seen him angry.

Jeff didn't look mad or angry instead he laughs a smile growing across his face.

"Of course you remember that" he says rolling his eyes, a massive smirk spreading across his face.

"Of course why wouldn't I" I laugh watching as he places his pinky figure out toward me. I knew what he was gonna do.

"Rule number 1" he whispers. I smile back at him wrapping my pinky finger around his.

Whatever circumstances or situations we are put through we will always stick together, even if it means the other person dies.