The Breakup [brollins]

thirty-seven

He has a secret.

My eyes scan over the new text from the unknown sender as I pack up my things to leave Seth's house. It has been a few minutes since the argument, and I had been replaying it in my head. It looked like someone other than Seth was trying to keep him away from me. But that text made me wonder, was his secret keeping him away?

Not many things made sense with Seth. I wondered what he wanted from me. What did he expect from our friendship? Or whatever it was... What did he expect after kissing me all the time? Saying that he wanted me? I was right all along.

It's just a part of his little game.

I shook my head, put on my coat, and zipped up my suitcase to get out of his house.

I decided to drive all the way to wherever the next house show was to talk to Charlotte. It ended up not being too far away. Chicago. I asked if we could talk somewhere lowkey, like an IHop, instead of inside the arena where others could hear us.

I took off my coat and draped it around the back of my chair. I sat there and stared at the brown, sticky table in front of me as I waited for Charlotte to arrive.

"Becky!" I heard from a distance. My heart almost dropped when I noticed she had brought a friend along. "I hope you don't mind I brought him!"

Dolph.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. I was ready to leave.

"What's up, Becky?" Dolph chuckled. I forced a smile in response. "How's your man candy?"

I glared at Dolph as a sudden silence overtook the room.

"Don't talk about Seth, Dolph," Charlotte said, "I think something's wrong with them."

My eyes flew from Dolph and Charlotte's eyes in this awkward position.

"Oh, what happened?" Dolph asked. "You don't have to talk about it," he said, surprising me. I glanced to my right to try to escape from the situation, only to lay my eyes on fingers being brushed through dark, curly hair in the distance of the restaurant. Distress was evident in his eyes as they met mine. I widened my eyes and quickly turned back towards Dolph and Charlotte, warmth creeping to my cheeks as I was caught staring.

Why was Seth here?

I glanced over at him again as I asked myself that question, only to discover that his eyes haven't left mine since he noticed my stare the first time.

"What are you looking at?" Dolph said, snapping me out of my thoughts. I turned towards them again, and took a sip of my coffee. "Nothing," I said lowly.

"Alright then," he said, "well if you're having problems with Seth, would you consider hanging with me again?"

I straightened my back all of a sudden, turning my head towards Seth again as I felt his eyes continuing to burn into mine from his corner of the room. He sent me a sharp glance before loudly scraping his chair against the floor. He dramatically took the last sip from his coffee cup and gathered all of his things. He also dramatically stared me down as he pushed the glass door to exit the building. I stood up instinctively, ready to follow him.

"Dolph asked you a question," Charlotte said as I grabbed my coat.

"Uh, sure," I said absentmindedly, realizing Seth has disappeared.

"Really?!" Dolph said excitedly.

"Wait, what?" I asked confusingly.

"You'll go out with me again?" He asked back.

"What? Absolutely not," I answered automatically, frowning as I sat back down, realizing how rude I sounded. "I'm so busy, ya know?" I replied in an effort to save myself.

"Oh, duh," he chuckled.

Somehow, going out made me feel worse. I was ready to rant to Charlotte, but there was no way of doing that with Dolph there. Later in my hotel, though, a knock appeared at my door and I felt my breath dying in my throat when I saw who was on the other side.

"Seth?" I said, giving him a confused glance as I wondered what he was doing there. I hoped and prayed he would come to me, and I wouldn't have to go to him, about what had happened. But I didn't expect it to be so soon and so willingly.

He shoved his hands in his front pockets nervously, shifting his gaze from my eyes to behind me in my room. "Sorry," he whispered, another surprise for me.

"What?" I asked him just to clarify that his apology wasn't just in my head.

He sighed, quickly throwing his curly hair into his signature bun. "I want you to know that I'm not a player," he said, "I don't mean to ruin lives. I felt like that's what you think, but if that's what it sounded like I said the other day, it's not what I meant."

I gave him a little nod, still confused as to why he was saying this. He said sorry, but it didn't seem like much of an apology.

"I'm sorry, Becky. I didn't mean to hurt you," he said quietly, seeming uneasy, "I-I like you, too," he hesitated. "I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what to do, I clearly don't know what to say..." he trailed, looking down at his feet. "I know that you know I'm hard to deal with, yet you've dealt with it. But I understand if you don't want to deal with it anymore." He paused for a few seconds before looking at me again and finishing. "I'm sorry this isn't some grand gesture to win you back, but I'm here if you want me."

I sighed. I knew that what he said during our argument was wrong, and that if it happened again I would need to seriously evaluate my feelings for him. But the fact that he tracked me down and opened up for an apology really said something. He messed up, he acknowledged it, and he is giving effort. I was going to give in. I shifted to the side and gestured him to come into my hotel room.

To my surprise, right when I shut the door and faced him, his lips were on mine.