Just Roommates. . .?

Chapter nine:)

Deku pov~

I haven't written in my journal in a really, really long time. I sit up from my comfortable bed and reach over to my nightstand drawer. I open it up and move my hand around, feeling all sorts of random things. Pens, Chapstick I haven't used in weeks, coins, and crumpled up paper. After finally finding my journal, I reach for a pen. I carefully open the book and put the pen on the paper. Now that I look at the paper, it's starting to turn a very light shade of yellow. Maybe it's time to get a new one. After all, I only have a few pages left and this one is literally falling apart. I guess I'll have to at some point but for now, I'll start writing. What should I write about? Classes are pretty boring so there's no point in writing in that. My friends? Uraraka, Tsuyu, and Kacchan. Kacchan... speaking of Kacchan where is he? I lift my head up and look over at his bed. He's not there. I scan the room until I spot him at his desk, "Hey, hey." He turns his head around from whatever he's doing. "Oh. It's the fucking nerd, hey." I smile then walk over to him and poke my head around his arm. "Whatcha you workin' on, Kacchan?" He shifts his eyes towards me, then back at a piece of paper. "I'm making a  list." "For what?" I ask curiously. "None of your goddamn business." I frown, "Rude." Kacchan continues to write on the piece of paper, ignoring me. 

                                                                                         ~~~

I hear the dorm door abruptly open and then slam shut. Kacchan's back! I turn my head around and inspect him, still looking the same. Did he not do anything?

After I finish being disappointed, I go back to writing in my journal, adding a new part about how Kacchan is being suspicious. After I finish the entry I put it back into the drawer. "So where did you go off to?" "Class." Well that's pretty boring, I was expecting something better than that. "Anything exciting happen?" "Nope. I'm gonna go to the mess hall, you can come if you want." "Mm. . . okay."

We go and get our food and eat together at a table away from everyone else. "You know what sounds really good?" "Hm?" He looks up at me while taking a bite of his food. "Cookie dough ice-cream." He rolls his eyes, "You're already fucking eating." I giggle, "It would be considered dessert, right?" "I fucking guess." "Then, once I'm done, I'm gonna go get some." He doesn't say anything back and simply continues to eat. 

"Do you want to come with?" I ask as I walk out of the mess halls exit doors. "If it makes you fucking happy." I smile, "Well then I guess your coming." We walk to my car from the mess hall and I start to drive.

"Hey, Kacchan?" "What." He asks sharply. "How old are you?" Something I've wondered for awhile but have always forgotten to ask during our long conversations. "Huh?" "How old-" "Nineteen." Out of the corner of my eye, I notice that he rests his head on the window. "Oh, then we're the same age." He grunts in response. "When is your birthday?" "April twentieth. Why are you fucking asking?" "S-sorry, I was just wondering." I'll have to remember that. Kacchan clears his throat, "Um, when is your birthday, not that a give a rat's ass." I giggle quietly, "July fifteenth." Kacchan mutters something under his breath that I couldn't hear, but I decide to leave it alone and continue driving. "Should we go through the drive through?" "I don't give a shit, it's you who wants the damn ice-cream." "A-ah. I suppose you're right." When we get there I suppose I will go through the drive through, I don't feel like going inside to eat. 

I hope Kacchan isn't tired because I don't feel like I could ever get tired of him. He does some very unexpected things sometimes, which I like. I like a lot of things about him I don't really care to notice in other people. Like how when the sun is setting it makes his eyes look brighter and more full of life, were as when it's dark his eyes are reflect that and in turn, become a very dark, crimson red color. When I notice things like that about him it makes me realize that there is so much more I should pay attention to. Not just about I'm, but everything and everyone. If there are so many things compacted into this one rough around the edges guy, what else is there in other people I don't see?  He makes it hard for me to think almost, like when I'm around him everything feels nice and the world is fuzzy. My stomach likes to do flip-flops and dance around, when all I'm trying to do is simply speak to him. Everyday is different with him, whether it be by a little or a lot. He truly makes me want to know what's going on inside of his mind.   

"Do you want anything?" I ask as I pull up to the microphone thing in front of the menu of a Braums ice cream shop. "I fucking guess. I'll have cookies and cream in one of those goddamn cups." I hum in response and role my window down anxiously as I wait for the cash register person to ask what I would like to eat. I sit perfectly still and take a few deep breaths. "Hello, what would you like to order today?" A cheery feminine voice chimed. I swallow the spit in the back of my throat that was threatening to choke me, "H-hi um, yeah. I w-would like an o-order of cookie dough ice-cream in a cup a-and an order of the uh, um. Crap, t-the uh, cookie dough ice-cream in a cup as well please." I close my eyes tightly in embarrassment. God I was terrible. I fumbled over my words and even forgot what I was supposed to say, it was perfect in my head. Why did it have to go like this? "Alrighty, that'll be fifteen ninety at the widow." "R-right. T-thank you." I slowly drive up, watching the car in front of me not move even an inch.

 "God. if I could just. . ." I mumble lowering my head to the top of the steering wheel, my forehead making contact with it. "You okay?" A low and soothing voice asks. I peer in the direction of the voice and am met with Kacchan's concerned expression. One that didn't happen very often. "Y-yeah it's just every time. . . " I put my hands underneath my thighs. "It's alright. We'll get through it." We? "The both of us?" He nods his head firmly, "If that's what you want too." I feel a stinging behind my eyes begin to get stronger and a chocking sensation in the back of my throat. "This shouldn't even be that big of a deal." Tears begin to make their unwanted way down my face and curving slightly under my chin. I lift my head up from the wheel and move my hand to put the cars mode in drive and move up ever so slightly. "It's fine if it's a big deal," I look over at him, trying to move my hair slightly in front of my face to hide my tears. He puts a hand to my face and moves his thumb along my under-eye, removing the tears, "Everything will be alright. I promise." He smiles kindly, "Why are you being so nice to me when all I do is mess up?" "Because you deserve it whether you think you fuck up or not." I blink away the remaining tears in my eyes, "I deserve it. . .?" "Yes, you do." I smile a little, "T-thank you." Although what he said made me want to decline that I could deserve anything, I hold my tongue because I know how stubborn he is with things. "C-can I have a hug p-please?" "I fucking guess, nerd." With hesitation I lean in slowly and wrap my still shaking arms around him, and he does so as well. I tuck my face tightly in the crook of his neck and I feel his strong arms squeezing me tightly in return. After a few moments we return to our normal positions and I move the car up a little more, feeling calmer than I was before mere minutes ago. 

I park my car in the parking lot next to a big red truck and start to stuff my face in ice-cream. Kacchan does the same, but not as- fast- per say. "So what was the list about, anyways?" "Just stuff I needed to do today." "Then why were you being all secretive 'bout it?" "'Cause you were being fucking annoying about it, that's why. Now eat your goddamn ice cream the you just had to fuckin' have!" I stifle a laugh, "Okay Kacchan." 

I wonder if I would feel the same way I'm feeling right now if someone else was here.