Every Lifetime I Fall {COMPLETED but undergoing revisions}

Chapter 153: KSG V

This feeling of helplessness... It is even worse than when I couldn't revive Senior Sister.

I feel like I'm failing Mingxian and Teacher Lu. Failing those I care about again. I cannot live with that.

I visit Senior Sister at Tian Guang Hall. My heart is troubled, mind is muddled.

I'm frustrated. Is this really all I have amounted to? Have I just been a fraud this whole time? Not truly skilled to cure anyone?

I mask my grievance and speak in a cheerful tone. "Senior Sister, do you know that Mingxian is so brave? She was able to help Madam Qian and is now a highly regarded physician of Invigorating Essence. You would be proud. Although... her anger should have a less severe aftereffect. That physician in the city was scared of a precious thing like her."

I laugh thinking about Mingxian's lecturing when she's angered. Like a little bird chirping by my ear, she is even adorable when angry. Sometimes it is scary to be on her bad side, I've experienced it.

Mingxian's smile. Mingxian's passion. Mingxian's happiness.

Kneeling beside Senior Sister, I carefully pick up her hand.

"I'm useless. It has been a month and Mingxian's eyes are still the same. Even using all of the Red Moon Drop and it didn't do a thing. Am I really this Prince of Medicine as they claim? What if I can't heal her? What if I can't save you? If you were here, you would know what to do. You would be able to cure her."

In silence, I wallow in despair.

For you, I can do anything. I can sacrifice anything. Yi Fei Jiejie, Mingxian...

"Senior Sister, don't try to talk me out of this. I'm doing it for you, but I'm also going to do it for her." I press her hand with reassurance.

I leave her and go straight to the medicine hall.

"All of you leave. No one is to disturb me, understand?" I head on in with the intention to work all day and night.

The disciples bow and leave the room, abandoning what they were doing. The drawers holding a variety of medicine stretch high to the ceiling, surrounding the large hall.

The door of the medicine hall closes causing a creaking echo to ring throughout the room. I pay it no mind, and write down a list of ingredients I need to make this new prescription.

"No more Red Moon Drop... Raven Feathers doesn't prove to be effective. Autumn Seeds are needed to mitigate any discomfort."

I add new ingredients to the original recipe, eliminating the depleted resources from before. 

Without sleeping, I watch over the pot, fanning the fire. Nodding off here and there, I pour myself some black tea. 

Finally, it is done. The steam from the medicine arise with a vacillating red fume. Placing a dark colored ceramic bowl on a tray, I pull the sleeve back revealing the linear scars on my left forearm.   

Using a golden scalpel with brimming emeralds on the handle, I force the blade deep in my skin. Skimming the sharp point across, I form a new scar with deep red blood seeping through. Hovering my wound above the bowl, I watch the blood accumulate. Enduring the pain, I let the blood drip until the right amount filled the bowl. After I smother the freshly sliced wound with an herbal paste, I wrap the scars on both my arms with bandages. The old scars have yet to heal completely. 

Pouring the brewed medicine in with the blood, the red fumes immediately spirals into a golden haze. 

I can no longer wait. Wiping the sweat on my forehead with my sleeve, I quickly set off to see Mingxian.