Roman

thirteen

Hello beautiful readers! Sorry for the late update, but I hope you are having a good day (or night). I hope you enjoy the update. I'm trying to make that chapters a little longer. I want to make them closer to 2,000 words instead of 1,000-1,500, so far they haven't been getting too much longer, but I'm trying. Let me know what you think of this chapter!

Mrs. Brandon's words have still been echoing in my head. I mean, not that had I thought all of Roman's anguish was over Cassey, but there was something in the way she said it. She couldn't have meant that some of it was for me. For just a second I let myself think about him actually liking me. I'm not completely oblivious, I know that he has been way touchier than ever before, but I know that he and Cassey just broke up and that he could be looking for something that I won't give him. Regardless, he is hurt and confused and I have just happened to be there, it's nothing more than that.

I take a shower in Naomi's bathroom, letting the water course over my body gently. My music plays softly in the background. I hear the door open and peek out to see Naomi now leaning against the sink, already looking at me. I hold the shower curtain to my chest and lean my side against the shower wall so that I can see her better.

"Sadie. You and Roman..." she trails off and my blood runs cold.

"Nothing has happened between us. I swear. I don't know what is going on with him, but none of it is my fault—"

"You're good for him," she cuts in before I can defend myself any more. I stare at her like she has grown a second head. "I don't know what is going on with him either, but I know that there is something going on between the two of you, even if nothing has happened. I think he likes you, Sades."

I'm good for him? It almost sounds like she is okay with there being something between us. Has Roman being off limits been in my head this whole time? Has Naomi been fine with it the whole time?

"Are—are you sure?"

"I mean I'm not saying that you guys should go and date right now or anything, but I think you can take care of him in a way that he won't let any of us take care of him. He is so head strong and always refuses my help, but something tells me that he would let you take care of him."

"Naomi, I—what if something goes wrong. I don't want anything to ever come between us. I don't know what I would do without you in my life." Despite her 'okay' I'm still nervous. Roman has never been an option for me, and now that he just might be, it seems like some sick joke just to get my hopes up.

"Worst case, I have to rip his balls off or have to make you feel really bad for hurting him, but no matter what, we will still be best friends, okay? And hey, best case, you'll be my sister."

We both smile at the thought. I tear my eyes away from her and go back to rinsing the conditioner out of my long hair. "But this all banks on the fact that he actually likes me and wants something with me," I sigh.

"Oh, trust me, he does. I never told you this, but there was one day, pretty early in Ro and Cassey's relationship, when I realized something. He had no trouble being affectionate to her, that is until you were around. I wasn't sure what it meant, I'm still not, but I hope it had something to do with him liking you. I never told you because I didn't want to make you feel bad, but till the day the broke up, as long as you were around, he hardly touched her. So what I think it really banks on, is you liking him."

I'm not sure how to take this information. There's no way that he can like me. I'm just his sister's best friend. I think about the night that I slept in his arms, the car ride that he slept in my lap, and the way he looked at me—and my boobs—in the car. I'm thankful that Naomi can't see the blush that rises on my skin.

"Is—is it okay if I like him?" I ask sheepishly.

"Only if you tell me how long you've actually liked him. Don't lie to me. I've seen the way you look at him when no one is watching."

Shit. I feel like I've been caught, even though she has essentially confirmed that it's okay. "Since about halfway through freshman year," I say quietly.

I hear Naomi's breath catch. I turn off the water and reach out from behind the shower curtain to grab my towel. I slowly wrap it around me and step out from the shower. Naomi still hasn't said anything and it's starting to scare me. She looks up at me with uncertainty. "You—you don't stick around because of him, do you?"

"Oh Naomi. No. Don't you dare think that. If I was sticking around for him, would I have basically lived here these past three years when he has been on the other side of the country. Naomi, you are my best friend. You have picked me up and put me back together. You stand up for me when we both know that I don't have to balls to do it myself. You make me happy when I feel like I could never be happy again. If I were just here for him, I would have left a long time ago, because it was too painful to see him with Cassey, too painful to know that I could never have him."

"Sadie, I wish you had told me. I can see why you didn't but I could have told you that it was okay, so you didn't have to try to hide your feelings."

"It's okay. I think, especially in those early days, keeping it secret made it more real to me. I could feel what I was feeling and I didn't have to prove my love for him to anyone."

"I won't try to push him to you because I want it to be all him, but for what it's worth, I hope you two end up together. I need a sister anyways. You just can't ditch me for him all the time."

|~|

Sticking true to her word, Naomi hasn't tried to push Roman and I together, but she also hasn't pulled me away to have some 'girl time.' Smart.

Mr. and Mrs. Brandon have gone to bed, leaving the rest of us—Roman, Naomi, Theo, John, and I—to do whatever we want, as long as we don't wake them. We are all stuffed from an amazing thanksgiving dinner, and I, apparently, am the only one that is ready to slip into a well-deserved food coma. Because they are dumb, the boys opted to watch a horror movie, having outnumbered Naomi and I's wish for a comedy. Fantastic. I have wrapped myself up in a few blankets and settled down on the couch with my head on Naomi's lap with my legs curled up so that I leave room for Roman who is sitting near my feet. He has his legs up on the ottoman and his head leaned back. He holds a beer in his hand, but I still have yet to see him drink any of it. His eyes vacantly watch the movie, he has been doing better, but I just wish that he would go back to being his normal self, I don't like this darker Roman.

I close my eyes, being too tired to keep them open, and listen to the intense sounds of the horror movie. And laughter. As they say, a horror movie with the right people really does become a comedy. Perfect for sleeping.

I stretch out a little when my legs start to get stiff. My feet almost immediately collide with Roman. I jerk them back quickly, worried that he will be annoyed by my kicking him, but instead, he places a warm hand on my ankle. My eyes flutter open so I can see him; his eyes are still trained on the TV; he hardly seems to have realized that he is touching me. Slowly I extend my legs again, this time, lifting them up just enough that my feet could make it up and into his lap. His eyes never leave the screen, but the hand that was on my ankle, wraps—as much as it can—around my lower calf, causing my skin to tingle where it meets his rough hands. I'm just glad that I shaved. He starts to move and I worry that he will push my legs off of him, but he only sets his beer down on the ottoman and places his free hand on my ankle. The hand on my calf begins to gently stroke my bare leg, his other hand rubs up and down my ankle.

His touch is intoxicating. I hate that even the simplest touches set my body on fire. My eyes slowly close, as if they were under his spell. His hands feel so good on my skin that I start to drift back to sleep, filled with content. His calloused hands continue to softly rub circles into my skin. If this is what it's like to date him, or hell, even be close to him, sign me up.