Happiness is Expensive (2yeon Fanfic)

3: Kiss From a Fool

"Are you sure you'll be fine alone? I could stay you know. You just have to tell me." Jinyoung consistently insisted on staying. He said he wanted to stay and take care of me. Well, don't get me wrong I appreciate that, but it's just that I know he's busy with his scheds too, pd-nim will get mad at him if he'll ever cancel all of it.

"Stop insisting Jinyoung. I'm not alone, I have unnie and oppa here. And besides, your manager might kill me if you ditch your appointments. Plus, get some rest I heard you've been here since yesterday." I said to him out of pure concern.

"Okay okay, I'll go." he said in defeat as he stood up and gathered his things. "Goodbye then, take care of yourself okay?" I nodded and smiled at him, waving him goodbye before he closed the door and left.

***

Midnight came and I was getting bored inside my room, my managers were asleep and I've got nothing to do. I dont even have my phone with me and I don't even remember where it is. So out of boredom, I decided to go out. I tried my best to sneak out as quiet as possible, wishing that I would not wake my managers up. When I got passed outside the door I slowly closed it, careful not to drop it and cause a huge banging sound that will echo through the hallways. I walked outside, and encountered quiet white hallways and rooms that seems empty, just like in a horror movie, but it's not creepy at all.

I continued walking until my feet led me to a rooftop. I was welcomed with strong rage of wind that made my hair messy and made me shiver in cold. But despite it all, it was beautiful in here, the sight was offering an aesthetic night view of Seoul that you will usually see in a painting or a photo.

I inhaled the cold air and closed my eyes. I put my hands in the pocket of a patient's uniform that I am wearing right now. This felt so good. I've been enjoying the wind now for almost 20 minutes, not even bothering taking a seat or getting tired from looking out at the city. I was enjoying it all, when suddenly a pair of arms slowly wrapped around my waist coming from behind me. It was warm and delicate, but still unknown, and that gave me weird and random thoughts to start and cross my mind.

Is this a murderer? Am I dying? Damn. I wanted to die atleast in my 40s so why kill me at 29? I was frozen and afraid of what might this person do to me so I remained standing, I was quivering in fear but at the same time thinking that this touch seems familiar to me.

What the hell am I thinking?

I was thinking of a way to escape this trap from a stranger, but suddenly a voice came from it, whispering in my ear something that lingered through my whole body.

"I miss you." She said.

Yeah, it's a woman, and it is that woman, Yoo Jeongyeon. After speaking naturally without  distorting her own voice, I already knew it was her. I hate myself for not even forgeting small details about her. I hate myself to a point that I'm unnoticeably crying because she's hugging me right now. I hate myself that I'm missing the warmth that she used to give me 10 years ago. The warmth that I never once felt for anyone but her, not even Jinyoung.

My body wanted to stay but my mind doesn't, so I escaped from her arms and pushed her away. In a split of second there, my only thoughts were that I missed her and I wanted to hug her back. But now, anger has already taken over me after recalling all the things she did and pushing her away is in dominance in me right now. I cannot do this.

I faced her and saw her in her white lab coat and inside it was her blue scrubs making her look respectable with that doctor's gown. She looks taller and her hair is longer than before, she looks prettier and more matured since the last time I saw her. She really is different from the Yoo Jeongyeon I used to know who is cute and used to wear her school uniform.

The changes on her reminded me of how long it had been since she left me. I can still remember the day like it was yesterday. How I cried so hard and begged so pathetically just so I could run after her. It's triggering all the anger that I burried inside me. That's why I couldn't help but just push her away.

"Are you even hearing yourself? What kind of bullshit are you saying right now?" I gasped giving her all the glares I've been suppressing all those years, well, I don't care about my status right now. It's just the two of us.

"I just told you. I miss you Nayeon-ah, I miss you so fucking bad." She said almost whispering every word. As soon as she said that she started crying.

How can she cry when she's the one who left? When she's the one who issued our break up? How can she miss me when she's the one who didn't show up for the past 10 years. I don't get her, she's confusing me. I couldn't help but get bitter.

"Wow Jeong! Wow! Don't you remember the day when you pushed me away so hard? When you broke me apart? When you fucking left me?! Don't you? Huh?!" I shouted until the veins of my neck that were about to cut off are evident out of anger. I started crying along with her and continued to blame her. "I don't get you! You just show up suddenly and tell me that you miss me, you--"

I got cut off when she suddenly kissed me. I pushed her once again but she instantly pulled me in my waist and started kissing me again, and that's when I lost the guts to push her away.

Just like how I knew Jeongyeon, she was gentle with every move. A major factor for me to lost the urge on pushing her away. My wish to just feel her kiss is taking over me. My anger just faded away in a snap. I forgot all of my resentments for her the moment our lips collided.

Foolishly, I kissed her back. I kissed her back like nothing ever happened. I kissed her back like she never left. I kissed her back like she never broke me down. I kissed her back despite of the pain that she brought me. I kissed her back along with the tears.

Until she slowly let go and hugged me once again.

"I'm speechless Nayeon. I want to apologize, but I don't know how to put it into words. I don't know how to express it. All I know is that I miss you. I miss you so much and I can't even control myself, I can't even stop myself." She hugged me even tighter and brushed my hair like she used to do years ago. I miss this but it just felt so wrong and that made go back to reality, that's why I pushed her once more, but much harder this time that made her step back unwillingly.

"This is wrong Jeong. Stop playing with me. I know I'm easy but stop hurting me like this. You really know how to get me back, but I'm not going to fall for it. If this is just another heartbreak you're bringing me, stop bothering me and go away, never show your face to me ever again." With that, I ran away from her with an aching heart because of the words I said to her. I ran away from the possible pain she could give me.

I ran away this time. It was me who ran away.