BTS: A Court of Embers

27: The Fifth Sunrise

The sky was still dark when Maren crawled out of bed and ran to the North Wing.

Her bare feet slapped against marble as she bound up the steps and to the left, passing the Neverin Suites. Before the Court of Dusk's door was Namjoon. The advisor knocked and waited, tearing his gaze away to acknowledge Maren.

"Good morning."

"Is he back?" Maren skittered to a stop. For good measure, she knocked on her own though it didn't make much noise.

"No. He would have answered by now," Namjoon said. When the advisor flattened his lips into a straight line, his dimples stood out. "I wonder where he could be."

"He can't be too far if he said he would return today."

Namjoon nodded. "You could be right. He also might not arrive until evening."

"Until evening?" Maren shrieked.

"He never specified." Namjoon lowered his tone. "Were you expecting him earlier?"

To put it simply, she'd hoped that by the time she opened her eyes he would be back in his chambers cooking up a concoction or handling a spellbook or whatever faekind used to manipulate the boundaries of fate. Preferably a weapon. Her dagger was still lodged in the mirror and there was no way in hell she was going to return to see if it was still available for use.

The magnitude of the morning had yet to truly land its mark, and she knew because she still searched for options. She still had hope--which could all be disintegrated if Faine took the liberty of showing her face seconds after the sun grew comfortable. But she clung onto it, and she held fast to the thought of Jimin following through. He may not be a High Prince but he knew what it took to be one. He understood how important this was.

Even so, Namjoon's question felt loaded. To say that she expected the Dauphin meant that she likely waited to embrace him. After declaring her choice for Jin, that would not be a good look to the advisor. To say that she wasn't expecting him, unless done correctly, implied that she hid some sort of truth.

The blood bargain was a truth.

"I don't know when he'll come," she said finally.

Namjoon sighed. "It needs to be soon."

"Is Jin in danger?"

"I would rather not say." The advisor kindly sidestepped her.

Maren watched him go. "But you should say it. I want to know."

Joon stopped. "Knowing him, he will make it to see another day."

She let the advisor go, glancing at her hand. He wouldn't make it. Maren made that impossible. If she had any chance to change that then she had to tell the advisor. She had to warn him.

"Namjoon, wait."

Joon halted once more.

She glanced at her feet, tears pricking her eyes. Everything she'd come to care for seemed to crumble in her hands. Her dreams of innocence in the eyes of the advisor and the Prince were picked up and tossed by the breeze.

Of all things, Jin's words were the first that she thought of.

You would rather beg for death than take accountability for your actions.

In a moment such a this, she knew that it was true. That hope to do good, to be good, suddenly faded away; eclipsed by the fear of ruining all the wonderful things in her corner. She would rather die with her heart full than let it stop while she drowned in the misery of past consequences as selfish as it was.