Learning To Love Him 37

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I opened my mouth but then shut it deciding not to interrupt him in case that caused him to retreat back into silence. He still stared down at the twisting phone, his face emotionless. My chest felt tight and I was hoping, no praying that this wouldn't lead up to where I thought it would. Though, given his earlier behaviour, it was hard to be hopeful.

"It was summer, I was ten, my birthday about a month away... Most of the pack had travelled, everyone else was doing something in town, working, I don't know. There were only about five people left in the packhouse at the time. I remember being happy when he walked into my room, my mom was at work so I was bored. I thought he was there to talk or play or something, I had a new game to show him... I-I didn't expect anything bad from him. I... He was... I didn't... I was excited to hang out with him... I didn't know." Jayden gave a sour smile as he shook his head, "I was pretty stupid." He muttered.

I moved from my couch and knelt on the floor in front of him before taking hold of his hands. I didn't want him to recoil, but I couldn't just sit there watching him anymore. He sounded like his mind was so clouded, his eyes stared into nothing. I wanted to talk about what had him so scared. I felt like I knew where the story was going, but I couldn't be sure. I couldn't assume something like that... Though, it seemed obvious.

"I never knew him to be anything but nice to me, but that day... He turned into my father... No, he was worse. So much worse... I thought he was..."

"Jay..." I whispered slowly noticing his eyes fill with tears. He pulled his hand from mine and wrapped his arms around his knees after lifting them to his chest before dropping his head into his arms. "Jayden..." I did not know what else to say.

"He beat me, worse than my dad ever did... and just when I thought it couldn't get worse, it couldn't-couldn't be more painful... he..." Jayden's hands trembled as he held onto his legs tightly when his voice cracked, "I had never felt more helpless in my life... I couldn't... he was stronger and-and heavy... I felt so weak, so sc-scared... I couldn't – I tried, I-I think I did – I did. I know I... but he was strong... I –" My chest felt crushed as a panicked, clogged sob seemed to rip from his chest. His crying sounded so painful. I was frozen for a few seconds before I snapped out of it and ran my eyes over him.

"Jayden... He...?" I drifted. This couldn't be real, it couldn't have happened, but it made sense... Why hadn't I realised earlier? "Jay –"

"I can't – I can't talk ab-about it –" His voice broke as more sobbing filled the empty room we were in. I quickly moved to sit on the arm of the seat so I could pull him into a tight hug, burying his head in my chest as I leaned my chin onto his head.

"It-it's okay. You don't have to." I assured.

"I'm so sorry." The whisper made me angry. I clenched my jaw tightly feeling his muffled sobbing against my chest. Why would he apologise?

"You have nothing to be sorry about, Jayden."

"Yes-yes, I do. I'm your mate... Mates aren't supposed to... I-I understand if you didn't want to do this anymore." He said, "I lied to you a-and I keep... I had sex with someone other than my mate. I'm so sorry –" He sobbed.

"No, you didn't. Stop apologising. It wasn't you. You didn't have sex with him – he fucking raped you!" I hissed. I regretted saying that when he shrunk away from me like the word held heat. I sighed wrapping my arms around him again and pulling him back against me. "Jayden, you have nothing – nothing to apologise for. I'm always going to want to do this, I promise... even if I act like I hate you sometimes." I added the last sentence trying to lighten the mood a little, it did not help at all. He was still crying, I could still feel his guilt. Why did he have guilt? It made me livid knowing that he felt like he held any blame for what happened. I pushed him away just a little in order to cup his face in my hands so that he would look at me, "Listen to me, you did nothing wrong, okay?" I whispered running my thumbs along his cheeks to remove some of the tears before my jaw clenched at the fear and remorse in his eyes, my chest burning. "Who is he, Jayden? Tell me. I'll make him pay. I'll fucking kill him." I promised. I had no doubt about it, I was going to kill the person that did that to him. I was going to hurt him as much as he had hurt Jayden. He shook his head. "Jayden," I began to plead.

"I-I don't wanna do this. I don't wanna talk about it. I don't want to remember it. Please." I glared at the tears running down his face and I wiped them away quickly.

"Fine... We don't have to talk about it anymore. Not right now."

I stood up and pulled him to the longer couch that I had laid on earlier. I watched his face slowly as I pushed him onto it before laying down beside him. We just laid together for a while as his crying slowly turned into sniffling before he spoke again.

"I'm sorry." He mumbled. "About-about earlier a-and –"

"Stop that or I'll punch you." He gave a strained chuckle at my empty threat, "You don't have to do anything you don't want to with me, alright?"

"But then we won't be able to mark each other or... and-and you'll eventually get bored or angry –" He was saying.

"Maybe one day I'll get frustrated, but I will never want you to regret something we've done. I don't want you feeling uncomfortable with me and I will never hurt you again. I'll wait. Besides, this is still pretty new to me, I don't want to move that fast either. It's still weird kissing you... but... I like... I love kissing you." He chuckled as I planted a kiss on his lips, they tasted salty and reminded me of his crying, "I'm not going anywhere, Jayden. You're my mate and we can't make Bianca grant more wishes so..." I smiled. He laughed and it made me ecstatic seeing that I could make him feel better, even very slightly. "And I wouldn't want her to, I'm happy with you." I slid my arms around his waist as I shut my eyes and pulled him closer to me.

"Corey?" He whispered.

"If you're going to say sorry again I'm going to shove a bucket of ice on you," I warned earning a breathy laugh from him.

"Nah... Thank you."

"Don't thank me either. I should be thankful you've forgiven me for all my crap." I replied. It was true.

His face broke into a small grin as his arms snaked around me while he nudged his face into my neck, planting a light kiss against my skin before resting his head onto the cushion as he closed his eyes. I watched as his breathing calmed down and became was soft and even showcasing that he had fallen asleep before my fists clenched behind him as I finally let myself feel the pulsing anger that I had been desperately trying to suppress in order not to scare him.

I was going to find out who hurt him, I was not going to let it go. I was going to kill them.

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