Manan ff:Reason Behind My Existence

Merry Christmas🎄🎁❄🎅

PLEASE READ THE NOTE! IT'S IMPORTANT...

Hey guys!!! What's up?!

Damn it's been so long.. I missed you all so much.

Well, first of all, Merry Christmas to all of you and your family.. 😊😊
I hope this Christmas brings a lot of brightness and happiness in your life..

Now you will ask me, 'what's the hell happened to you Moon? You literally just disappeared, now popping up suddenly out of nowhere?! Is this some kind of joke to you? You have responsibilities, duties to take care of. You can't just do that.'

Am I right or am I right?!

Trust me guys, I have been telling myself the same since these past few months. But you know sometimes its hard, it's really hard to get it over.

My Dadu had passed away.
I finally said it.. After being in denial for all these months, I am finally stating that he is no more. My dadu had left me at 1.15 pm on 4th Nov, 2019. He had been sick since before the puja. Doctors had already said us the final words but we held him back and when we were thinking that he was fine, he was gonna be ok, he just showed us his tongue and ran away and this time, he is out of our reach.
It feels so unreal.. He was here just then, now he is gone..
All those memories.. All those moments spent together... All those times.. It feels so fresh and new.. But all of them are past... It's hard to accommodate..
They say every pain fades away with time. But it's not going... It's still here in my heart... And time by time, it gets heavier..
I miss him.. I miss him so much.. I just started my life and he left me, he had left my hand. He had no choice I guess..
His death really affected my family. My maa, baba and myself were very much close to him and his death left a hollow in our lives.
We knew this was going to happen. We knew he wasn't gonna make it but therefore he was there, with us, now he isn't and I don't know what to do?!
I just wish wherever he is right now, may he rest in peace...

I can't do anything more than that. Right?!

I know, maybe some of you are thinking why I am telling you this. But you guys think or not, I myself consider you my family. Moreover I thought I owed you an proper apology. I am sorry. I have been not myself since. But I will try to be more active from now on. Just give me sometime. Ok?

And I can't thank you enough for being there for me. There was a time, when I lost every hope. I didn't know what to do with myself anymore. At that time,you guys helped me through it.
All those people who have been talking to me, I can't thank you enough. I don't know what I have done to myself if you were not there. Hey.. Hey... Don't worry, I am not into self-harm and I don't want anyone to be in that situation ever.

It really helped talking to you guys. I am a very private person but there is a saying that sometimes you can open up to a complete stranger and they will make you feel better.

I know what I have gone through and I know how does it feels. So I have a proposal to make. Let's help each other. There are so many people out there who have been dealing with depression, let's help them and let's help each other to make a healthy and happy community.

You guys can share your life story here or you can contact me privately anywhere. Even if you guys are comfortable enough then let's make a WhatsApp group where we will only talk about ourselves, each other. There won't be any other thing, just talking on how you deal with your life. But it's ok you guys are not in. That's completely fine. Sachi me. 😊😊

I just want that no one ever felt what I have felt in these past few months. Trust me, it's the worst feeling ever, so painful even.

And I promise I will update the stories more often.. Pakka pakka.. And sorry if I didn't reply to your msgs. As I told before, I was not myself. But I will get back to you quickly. I promise..

See you soon...

#stayblessed
#keepsmilling
With love
Moon ❤