𝔓𝔞𝔰𝔰𝔦𝔬𝔫 • 𝕽𝖎𝖈𝖍𝖎𝖊 𝕿𝖔𝖟𝖎𝖊𝖗 [1]

07 - 𝙷𝚘𝚠 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝙳𝚊𝚛𝚔 𝙱𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚊 𝙵𝚎𝚊𝚛

Richie dropped me off at home about two hours ago, which I didn't mind. I think I needed atleast some time alone, especially after everything that happened today. With school, Greta, Bowers and his goons, my panic attack, my meds. Everything was pretty much fucked. I just wanted some time alone, and if it was shitty to want that, then I guess I'm a real shitty person.

I was sitting down on my bed, reading a book out loud. "The next four or five days were the longest days I've ever spent in my life. We killed time by reading Gone with the Wind and playing poker. Johnny sure did like that book, although he didn't know anything about the Civil War and even less about–"

I was stopped by the opening of my bedroom door. "Ashley?"

My mother walked in slowly, evidently not wanting to disrupt my peace since she already knew I've had a bad day. I looked into her eyes, which were a beautiful shade of green and had looked like my own. Shooting her a simple smile, I closed my book lightly before setting it down on my bed. "Yes?"

She sighed softly as she made her way towards me, sitting down on the edge of my bed gently so she wouldn't move it too much. "Richie told me what happened with Henry."

"I already told you that before.", I laced my eyebrows in confusion.

"No, sweetie. What happened today. He also told me that you threw away your medication.", She frowned slightly.

"That wasn't on purpose.", I tried to defend my actions.

"Honey, nobody said it was. I picked you up some more, and I want you to take them first thing tomorrow. I know that you guys are planning on hanging out together, and I'm sure they're already worried about you as it is.", She scooted closer to me before climbing up beside me. I moved a little to make room for her. "So, what exactly caused that attack?"

"What usually causes it. Stress. Either that, or I was just really shaken up. Belch almost hit me with his car today.", I glanced at her quickly, noticing her raising her eyebrows.

"He.. I'm sorry, he almost hit you with his car?", She raised her tone in disbelief. "Those pricks need to learn a thing or two about respect. So, they not only tried to rape you, but they try to run you over, then they threaten you?"

"Thomas touched me today.", I sighed softly, thinking back to what happened. "When they started walking away, Richie was quick to come over to me. He pushed me behind him so they couldn't look at me."

"That boy is head over heels for you.", My mother grinned widely, shaking her head at my confused expression. "Oh, don't act like you don't know."

"Well, I know that he likes me, and he knows I like him, but we just haven't really talked about it since we told each other.", I told her. She kissed the side of my head as she pulled me closer to her.

"My little girl is growing up.", She hugged me tightly.

"Mom. It's not a big deal.", I commented with a giggle following after.

"It is a big deal. With liking boys, with relationships, then next thing you know, you'll be married to him with a kid.", She ranted on.

"Marrying Richie?", I raised a single eyebrow, causing her to laugh. "Mom, I don't even know if I'll be able to put up with him for that long."

She only smiled. "I said that about your father. We ended up getting married in Pennsylvania. It was a weird place to get married, but we made it work. Then, we had you and we were happy."

"Until we began moving all the time.", I frowned.

"Your father was a military man, sweetie. We couldn't help it."

"I know, but I just– I wish he was still here.", I looked at her closely and saw the pain in her eyes. It's been months since I've seen that, and now I felt bad for bringing it back. "Mom, I–"

"Shh.", She shook her head. "We've got to be able to talk about these things. Your father wouldn't want us to try and move past it as if it were nothing. He was troubled ever since he was a kid, honey. He couldn't run from his demons. It worries me, seeing you struggle with your anxiety, baby. I watched your father go down a dark road for years, and if I ever push you to your limit, let me know."

"I will, mom."

"You're all I have.", Her voice cracked at the last word. Tears escaped her eyes as if it was on cue. I hugged her gently while she cried her pain away.

Some people don't realize how hard it is for us. They see us as freaks. They call us suicidal because of my father. They've made our name have a horrible reputation, which sucks incredibly because my father was such a great person. He always knew how to make me happy.

"One!", My mother started the count down.

"Two!", I added.

"Three!", She spoke happily, untying my blindfold.

I opened my eyes to the sight of my father standing in the doorway with a rose in his hand. As if it couldn't get any better, he held a stuffed animal in his other hand.

"My girls!", He called out as my mother and I went rushing over to him.

"Dad!", I shouted before wrapping my arms around him. "I thought you couldn't come back for another month?"

"Well, I couldn't miss my girl's thirteenth birthday.", He smiled happily as he handed me my stuffed bear. It was a simple gift, but since it came from him, it was perfect.

"So what's gonna happen now that you're back, Joey?", My mother asked him. "Will you have to return next month?"

"Yes.", He nodded, which made me frown. "But, that just means I have a whole month with my beautiful daughter, Ashley, and my amazing wife, Lorelai."

I glanced over at my mother, seeing she had a huge smile on her face. Life was perfect for the three of us, and I couldn't ask for anything better.

That month he spent with us was cut back short. Apparently, he saw a lot of really fucked up shit where we was stationed at, and it got to his head. Many soldiers usually have a lot of PTSD, and my dad really had it bad. For a week, he would lock himself in his room and we could hear stuff being thrown around. The following week after that, he'd drink. Then, he took his life.

He had shot himself in the head. Blood being splattered all over the wall behind him, which took a while for us to get rid of. We still live in the house, but my mom and I never step foot in that room. She sleeps in the downstairs bedroom, while I sleep in the second upstairs bedroom. That room is fully off limits for either of us, we made that deal awhile back.

I found him when we was dead. It was after school, and I had opened the door and walked into the room. I didn't turn on the lights in case he'd be sleeping, but once I got closer to the bed, I tripped over an object. That object just so happened to be my father's corpse. Since then, I've been petrified of the dark.