Inside The Outsider

He rubbed my growing belly and kissed my cheek again," Me? Disturb the baby? It's not even here yet and it's already giving me a headache." Dally rested his head on my shoulder and massaged my belly," You'll be fine doll." I swatted him away but he grabbed my wrist instead. He lightly dragged me over to the couch and sat me down," Relax–I can take it from here." I was about to get up but he held me back, placing a small kiss on my cheek," Relax."

He went over to the stove and stirred the contents in the pot. He's been so excited about the baby. When I told him a few months back, I thought for sure he would leave me. However I was very wrong. He always expressed how much he hated kids, but I guess a kid on his own was different. I'm grateful though, I couldn't do this without him.

"Austin, get down now!" The little curly haired toddler ran around the apartment completely naked," Noooo!" I chased him all around with a diaper in hand. He was small and it made it even harder for me to catch him. Suddenly the front door opened and Austin ran right to it. Before he could fully exit, Dally caught him with his extended arm. He threw him on his shoulder as he closed the door shut," You givin' mommy a hard time?"

I stomped over to them and attached the diaper to Austin. I could feel Dally's amused face turn towards me," I've had enough. I want to trade roles. I work and you take care of this rascal." Dally tried to embrace me, but I brushed him off of me," Come on D. It can't be that bad." I crossed my arms and raised my eyebrow," Is that so–Then you watch him.I'm going to sleep." I turned away from them and stomped to our bedroom. I kicked off my house shoes and plopped on the bed not even bothering to cover myself in the comforter.

Surprisingly, I woke up from my sleep. I looked over at the alarm clock and it was 3 o'clock in the morning. I got up from the bed and went out into the living room. I covered my mouth to keep from screaming. The apartment looked like it did when we first got it. Trash. Dally and Austin were on the couch sleeping crazily, their limbs everywhere. I wanted to smack Dally awake but I just shook my head instead.

I grabbed Austin from his crazy position and held him in my arms. I put him in his crib, that he's out growing, and went back to Dally. I shook his shoulder," Dally. Dallas," I lightly smacked him across the face," Dallas." He shot up from his sleep and stood up in front of me," See it wasn't that hard." I furrowed my brows," Dallas! this is a mess!" Dally examined the room like it was nothing," But he's asleep." I crossed my arms and shifted my weight to one leg," Clean this up."

I walked close beside Dally as he carried Austin on his shoulders," I want that daddy!" Austin kicked joyfully. Dally grabbed his legs tight," Hey kid, you kick me again and you're walking." Austin calmed down for a quick second, but immediately got excited again," But I want that daddy!" "Yeah I heard you the first time."

It was so amusing seeing Dally and Austin bicker at one another. Dally finally met his match, turns out it was a 4 year old child. I tugged on Dally's sleeve, he looked down at me with so much concern," Are you good D?" "Slow down." He placed a hand on my stomach." Sorry doll, I forgot." We walked into the store with the toy that Austin wanted. Dally put him down and Austin sprinted to the object.

A smile grew on my face as he tried to pick it up from the shelf. Dally came from behind him and grabbed the toy. Austin ran to the other toys and picked them up," Hey-hey! Only one man." Dally grabbed the toys from him and placed them back on the shelf. He gave him the original toy that nearly took over his whole body. I walked over to help him but he moved away," I got it mommy." I put up my hands," Okay okay you got it."

After toy shopping, we walked to a restaurant that wasn't segregated and ate there. We got a lot of stares of course, from whites and negroes. I kept Austin as close to me as possible. Even though he was a wild child, it was like he always knew when I was nervous or scared; and he'd calm down just for me.

The night came pretty quickly after we ate. Dally paid for our food and we left the restaurant. Dally wrapped his arm around me as Austin held onto my hand. We walked down the sidewalk admiring things in the windows. I felt Dally's arm tense up when a group of white guys were approaching us on the sidewalk. They were being obnoxiously loud and staring directly at us.

As they passed, one of them bumped Dally's shoulder," Watch it Nigger Lover!" The one that bumped him laughed. Dally quickly let go of me and turned to face them," What was that!?" Suddenly, all of them turned around and crowded towards us," You heard me," He got close to Dally's face," Nigger.Lover." Dally pushed me and Austin back before his fist collided with the guys jaw. Sending him back against his friends.

Dally's strike was like a green light. All the guys immediately went after him, throwing punches left and right. I grabbed ahold of one of them and tried to pry him off of Dally. But he shoved me back and I fell onto the sidewalk. Austin came running over to me, holding my arm as tight as he could," Stop it! STOP!" I yelled from the top of my lungs.

I looked around the streets, people were just standing around. Spectating from a far. I tried to get up from the sidewalk, but I physically couldn't. My growing bump was too big for me to do anything. I shielded Austin as best as I could from the monstrous men that were beating his father senseless.

My head was spinning, forever spinning. My emotions were running high, too high for me to function. One of the guys turned towards me, he didn't say a word, his menacing glare kept my body stiff. In unison, they moved away from Dally's limp body and walked away. The one that Dally first punched gave one last hard kick to his body, which made me flinch, and he spit on him as he stalked by.

Once they were fully out of sight, I crawled over to Dally's body. I lifted his head onto my lap, I pulled him close to me. I could feel Austin right behind me holding me tight. I couldn't look at Dally, I knew he would look unrecognizable. Tears were streaming down my face and my throat was swelling.

People were still standing around or they would stare as they walked by," HELP! Some–Somebody help us!" They still did nothing," HELP US!...." I cuddle Dally in my arms as I stroked his hair,"....help..."