roommates [BTS Crack]

Hoes mad

"Dude do you think i'm a hoe" asked Jungkook while taking a sip from his caramel macchiato.

"Nah Kooks you a bitch" Jimin said cooly

Jungkook raised an eyebrow "Isn't that the same thing though?"

Jimin spat his earl gray tea on Jungkook's shirt "Bro you're like, so uneducated on the subject." He stared Jungkook up and down with a disgusted look on his face "I didn't know you were so ignorant."

Jungkook frowned at that. "Dude it's not that deep-"

"IT IS!" Screamed Jimin, making his chair fall backwards as he got up violently. "I bet you can't even tell the difference between a hoe and a thot" The family sitting at the table behind him covered their daughter's ears and quickly left the café.

"Jimin they're literally synonyms stop being such a hoe" Jungkook got up as well so he was able to stare down at Jimin and not the other way around.

"I'M NOT BEING A HOE I'M BEING A BITCH GET YO FACTS STRAIGHT"

"Ok then bitch why don't you stop swearing you fucking cunt." Jungkook raised the tone of his voice, surprising even himself. "Using derogatory words towards women is for fucking degenerates anyway." He turned his head to the side to avoid Jimin's intimidating glare.

"First of all stop swearing first and then I'll stop" He paused for fifteen seconds and then added "you bitch" Jungkook let out an exasperated sigh. "Second of all, what makes you think I'll call women all these words" Jimin put his hands on his hips in a sassy way. "They're reserved for you asshole."

Before Jungkook could respond to that, a waitress came over to their table and got in between them "I'm sorry gentlemen but I'm afraid that I'll have to kick you out of the café if you don't start behaving. You're scaring the other customers."

"Please ma'am" Jimin pleaded "I'm trying to educate this ignorant fuck on the difference between hoes and thots and bitches."

The waitress stared at Jimin, then at Jungkook, then at their drinks on the table, a second time at Jungkook and finally again at Jimin before saying in a monotone voice, seemingly dead inside "leave."

Jimin turned around dramatically "Fine! Your coffee tastes like ass anyway" He began walking out of the café, all eyes on him.

Jungkook stared at him confused "Bro what are you talking about ass tastes great especially Taehyu-"

The waitress put a hand on Jungkook's mouth "Don't" Her scary glare almost made him pee himself right then and there. He quickly nodded and left the café in search of Jimin. Said boy was standing quite awkwardly waiting for the bus.

Jungkook put a hand on Jimin's shoulder "Nah man I'm not a bitch, I'm definitely hoe material."

Jimin slowly turned around, his face redder than Kylie Jenner's dildo.

And it all started again

A/N: I hope you enjoyed this first chapter of a mess of a book lol. It's my first time writing crack so I hope It's not too cringy and that it at least made you smile.

If you have any constructive criticism leave it here --->