Keşke

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And suddenly he was gone.

Gone from Istanbul.

Gone from her life.

As if he had never existed.

He had left just after the photoshoot for Polen's book. His "hoşçakal" was still echoing in her ears, ripping open her heart a bit more than it already was.

Resolute though inconsolable, she had followed Yiğit and took a plane for Izmir that night. He would fly for London the very next day.

This was not how she had envisioned her first flight to be.

He had promised that he would show her the world but instead he decided to run away. It was his coping mechanism. The only way he knew to deal with problems.

He had promised her. She remembered his smile and the light in his eyes. He seemed so excited to be the one who would take her around the world. Keşke ...

Another broken promise, another hope left to wither and die. Just like her heart.

 Yiğit and she were only gone for a few days to meet one of Sanem's favourite authors. Despite all the efforts Yiğit deployed, the Izmir trip quickly turned sour. She was quite happy to be in her beloved Istanbul once again. Even though there was a part of it missing now. The millennial city would never be the same.

Its colours dulled.

Its appeal faded.

His presence had turned into a ghost she was likely to meet around every corner.

She missed his laugh. She missed the warmth in his eyes. Surprisingly, she missed his touch the most. The way he was combing his long elegant fingers through her hair. He was a man who needed constant physical contact, always looking for her hand, for her face, for her lips. He had utterly contaminated her. She felt cold and empty, the fire gone from her cheek. She was Sanem in pieces, a mere shell of what her former self used to be with him.

Left with a hole in her heart and a hole in her soul, Sanem decided to pour all her energy, her anger and her frustrations into the writing of her novel.

Despite the resentment and the ache she felt, she made a book about love. The story of their love. The story of her undying love for him despite it all.

Within three weeks she had it all written down and edited. It took another month to get it published and Zümrüdüanka ile Albatros hit all the bookstores of Turkey.

It was an instant bestseller.

Sanem's genuine and sensitive depiction touched people's hearts like no one before. It was not a teary account by all means. It was honest. It was uplifting. It was hopeful. A legendary love story in which people could recognize some of their own life experiences.

She felt surprised however by this sudden success. She never had imagined it to be that bittersweet to enjoy though, as she was not able to share it with the only person that really mattered to her. She couldn't help wonder where he was and what he was doing as she was signing her novel to complete strangers.

I really loved your book! It was so romantic!

Was he still in London with Polen?

I hope there will be a sequel! Please do write one!

Was he already taking pictures in the Balkans?

Can you sign it for my daughter Ayşe? She's one of your biggest fans ...

Was Polen going to accompany him?

Miss Sanem you are my most favourite author! I love you!

Until I See You Again ... (A CanEm Story)Where stories live. Discover now