USM One Shots

Nobody's Perfect

Hello my beautiful people! So I was thinking, and I realised that some of my friends think Spidey's perfect! I had to think about it for a few minutes cause I couldn't believe it! So yeah, here's a one-shot that I like to call 'Nobody's Perfect'! Also, Ben has a little secret uwu. I hope you enjoy, gente guapa!

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Swinging through the city always calmed me down. Maybe it was the air gliding along side of me as if I were its guide. Or even the tourists looking up in awe, as if they had never seen a hero before. I don't think I'll ever know why I enjoy it. 

I land on a billboard, smiling down at the New Yorkers rushing through the streets as if it were their last day alive. Before I could take a whiff of the cool New York air, J. J. Jerkface yelled, "That web-slinging menace! Why won't he ever stop hurting the innocent people of New York?!" which made me fall off the board, but luckily I caught myself with a web before I went splat of the ground.

Before I realized it I was swinging through the familiar city, almost as if I was one with New York. Up ahead I saw Ava and Danny finishing beating some robbers or drug dealers or whatever up. I landed next to them, remarking, "You headed back now? 'Cause the crime rate seems pretty low today."

"Yeah, these guys were the only bad guys I saw in, like, half a mile. So, yeah, we're headed back," Ava says. 

Danny nods, adding, "Good things take time. But today, good things have come our way."

"Yup. But remember, never trust your luck. There might be some creeps hiding in the shadows you just haven't seen yet," I say, gazing between them both, my arms crossed.

"Wow, you actually said something genuine. I'm surprised! Are you sure you're the real Spidey?" Ava asks sarcastically.

"Hardey-har-har." I chuckle, turning around and swinging away. 

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I walk into the classroom, and Venom upon seeing me perks up, and chants, "Hey Spidey! How was patrol?"

"Good! There was hardly any crime today, it was weird," I chirp, happy with today's little crime. 

"Isn't that just perfect. Perfect Spidey had a perfect day. Ha ha," Ben grunts, clearly mad at something. 

"Pfft? Perfect? Me? Yeah, right," I mumble, though I still try and display a bit of positive emotion. 

Ben just grunts to my response, while he focuses on a notebook. 

"What ya got there?" I question, walking over to try and look at the notebook Ben tries so desperately to hide. 

I'm usually not the type to intrude, but I wanted to know what he was doing. He closes the book, then looks at me and barks, "Nobody looks at this, punk."

I step back, surprised, and joke, "Sorry dude, I didn't realize you had a scrapbook full of porn! And you don't even want to share it with us!"

Oops. Maybe I SHOULDN'T have said that. Every head in the room stares at me with total confusion, and Danny and Ava join to, though Peter didn't notice them come in. 

I grunt, deadpanning, "C'mon guys, it was just a joke."

Ben gets up shaking his head, walking out.