ONCE A WALLFLOWER: When will this story be mine?

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS

"Yeah?" I said in a tremulous voice.

I'm really nervous!

I can't think straight this is bad.

"What is it that you wanted to tell me?" I asked as my hand began to shake.

"Try to share something that you know will surprise me"  He said in a clear and light voice.

He must be used to talk with other people.

What?

Share something..

BUT

I just have nothing interesting to talk about.

Now my hand is sweating and I squeezed my eye shut

"The reason behind I don't want to cut classes is because I feel guilty for my mom. Like my every day that I am supposed to be in school is paid with the money she worked hard for. " I said continuously, without even thinking.

What?

I realize what I've just said

Why did I tell him that!

There's silence on the other end of the phone.

I heard giggling

Now he's laughing so hard.

"It's not that I am not taking you seriously, but I told you to surprise me, but it made me laugh." His voice sounds wheezy now, like catching his breath.

"So am I a form of entertainment to you now?" Trying to sound serious, so I can escape to that embarrassing moment.

"Where the hell it came from? It's just that I didn't see that coming. Ummm, is that your best way to escape?" He said as if he can read my mind.

"Just tell me already. What is it?" I asked.

I know he can feel I'm embarrassed.

"You've got a lot of things going through your mind. " He added

He is clever.

I don't know if he's joking or it's a sudden realization.

And I laugh

Because it's true.

I personally wanted to just stop thinking, but my mind keeps on analyzing things.

"It's seems like you cannot move on to something when you're misinterpreted." He added.

"Yeah, definitely! I mean I always wanted to make things clear" I said

I like to keep it simple because he's like hungry eater of truth.

The more you lie to him the more he will provoke you.

"You know what, there's nothing to be shy if you value that much the money your mother is working hard for." He said.

"Is that a sympathy?" I asked trying to make the conversation less serious.

"No, why would I do that? I mean I just think that's cool, you've got our own way to be cool" He said straightforwardly.

I am not cool.

But I get what he is trying to say.

There are persons out there that looks cool: branded clothes, expensive car, money and etc. But life isn't just about that, we can't tell when will life's gonna mess with us..

"I hate it when a person acts cool, but when you remove their source of money they can't stand alone. I mean it's not appropriate to brag something you don't work hard for." He said

"And act like a superior over those people who are incapable." I said continuing his sentence.

From that moment I know now that we're on the same page.

"No pain, no gain, I am getting it. You've gotta know how to work for what you want. Some are lucky, but most of the time they take it for granted not knowing other people are praying so hard just to have it. " I added because I am hooked in the conversation.

And it's the sad reality that sometimes money wins over talent.

"Maybe they don't know what it feels like to have nothing, and what it takes to have something. They will never understand because they never felt it. sometimes we only find its value when we lost it already." I said continuously trying explain my thoughts, but he remain silent.

Wow that came out naturally.

I guess I am just driven by the topic.

"WOW. I am fascinated because you're sensible and deep to talk to. I think I found out your interest now" He said out of nowhere.

"So this phone-call thing is because.." I said, but is interrupted.

"When a person is interested in something they can tell you a lot about it and they are being sincere, you could hear it from their voice. And yes, I called because I wanted to learn how to approach you." He said explaining, what the purpose of this call.

Stunned.

He is completely different from the Gretch I know. 

I knew it! There's always a bigger reason behind his actions.

Why?

I mean why is he doing this I am confused but afraid to ask.

I am scared.

I am aware that there are people whose interested in you at first and eventually they will leave you when they discover your dark side.

And it makes me feel like I am not good enough, like my bad side is the only thing they see

And that feels awful.

I feel judged

And empty.

"It's your turn, " I said. I am trying to change the topic before it gets out of control.

"Something that will shock me, tell me now." I added in case he doesn't get what I am talking about.

But as I try to continue the conversation, I just can't stop my mind from thinking. 

"Ummmm please don't laugh." He said.

"Your voice sounds different" He stops, but I didn't answer.

"It sounds like a cold wind."

"Or peace."                                         

Then I stopped thinking

I could hear his sincerity

I was moved by someone.