If I Knew Then

Chapter 16: NSYNC

The night of the basketball game, Brian was nervous for a number of reasons. He'd gone to get Nick before they all went over to where it was being held to talk to him in private, because he was fully into getting the conversation with the other group.

"So you're going to come with me to talk to them, right?" Brian asked in a hushed voice so that AJ wouldn't hear him. Nick seemed a bit distracted and then focused.

"Um...yeah, I'm coming with you. Are you sure this is a good idea, though? Lou said they hate us. I don't feel like fighting with them."

Brian placed a hand on Nick's shoulder and reassured him they'd be fine as long as management didn't try to interfere with the conversation, which he had a feeling might happen. Nick stared at Brian the whole car ride to the venue, thinking about the things Brian had been saying to him the last few days. That they were a team, that they were unstoppable together and how he trusted him completely to help him. However, he also heard Leighanne in the back of his mind begging him to help her convince Brian to go to a doctor about the chest pain....and he agreed with her to the point where he meant to bring it up but it never seemed to happen. He knew Brian wouldn't appreciate him and his girlfriend talking about him behind his back because he didn't like when Brian and her did it to him.

"You okay, Brian?" Nick asked suddenly, causing him to look back at him.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm just thinking about things."

"Like what?"

Brian shifted in his seat as he watched the passing traffic from the window. He had so much that he wanted to say to Nick but he held back and just blurted out what his brain was thinking, not his heart. His heart wanted to tell Nick that he lied to him back in July and it was bothering him. The truth was, his heart and his mind had been wrestling with these new feelings for Nick and the fact that the proper thing to do was stay with Leighanne because he should be. He felt bad for lying to her too because he liked her, but he wasn't in love with her as Nick had not so nicely pointed out on multiple occasions during angry outbursts.

Yet now Nick and Leighanne were acting friendly and this left Brian even more confused than before. At least when they were at odds he didn't feel obligated to be swayed either direction. Brian just wasn't sure how to put how he felt to words and he knew it was going to take some time to deal with it. Sometimes he wanted to ask Nick how he came to the conclusion that he was gay, how it all started...the truth. The feeble explanation Nick gave back in July didn't seem to be the full story. Something was missing.

"Just got a lot on my mind about the tour, about Lou..."

Nick nodded thoughtfully.

"Sorry, it's not that I don't want to talk about it, it's just a lot and I don't know what's going to happen. Like if I go up against Lou, he goes to the label - and the label drops us...what do we do? We've all worked so hard. I don't want to ruin that for you guys. Lou is literally stealing from us, you should see what my parents helped me dig up after I overheard him on the bus talking to your mom that day. I found out so much crap, Nick. It's making me so sick that he's taking advantage of us and that other band. I have to say something to them, what if they don't know? I'll never live with myself if I don't say something." Brian confessed softly.

"Really? Lou's stealing from us?" Nick asked.

"That's just the tip of things, but yes."

"I knew he was up to something, but this is...this is not what I was thinking at all."

"Yeah...he's taking our money and giving us crap. I just want him to make things right, Nick. I want him to pay us. We did the work. Not him. I'm just scared, I guess. What are we going to do if nobody believes me?"