The Weekend

Crimes against the Netherworld

There on the roof, you saw a particularly frightening woman if you could even call her that. She looked otherworldly with her hair perched high like a swirling plume of dirty smoke, piercing blue eyes and wrinkles that were so deeply embedded into her face it was like time itself branded it on her as a permanent reminder of her sour attitude towards all things well and good. Her getup spoke another thousand words for your descriptive thesis on this lady – thick frames hung loosely on her nose that was safety accompanied by a draping beaded string, while she wore a matching suit. It was something like Beetlejuice's one, but more distorted in its black and white lines, like a marbling pattern as it breathed personality and life into her... deathly state.

You glimpsed at her neck and you could have sworn you saw some foul smoke seep out of it. She croaked out "You good for nothing excuse for a son! I should have you exorcised!" She charged forward toward Beetlejuice and started yanking him by the ear whilst screaming out "YOU DARE HURT YOUR MOTHER? I FED YOU WHEN YOU WERE AN ANKLE BITER AND YOU RETURN THE FAVOR BY FEEDING ME TO A SANDWORM?!" Beetlejuice winced, hands curling as he bundled them on his chest as she yanked and tugged his earlobe whilst lashing out shrill screams in his ear. It hurt you just watching him in pain. "Can you even comprehend how much paperwork I had to fill out?! The reports I had to make?!? Not only did you commit multiple offences – including extensive tampering with living environments beyond the legal amount, manipulation of sandworms-"

"That's an offence?" Beetlejuice dared to question which caused Juno to seethe out "Oh, you have no idea how illegal it is. But what is most infuriating was even when I was out of commission in that short time, you CONTINUE to break the rules. HELL, YOU'RE DOING IT CURRENTLY." As she progressively got back to her initial piercing volume, she shoved Beetlejuice backwards causing him to stumble over to you. You mostly caught his form before he could knock you two both over as you tried to console him by stroking his hair while he rubbed his hand against the abused ear.

"I mean I haven't "done" her yet but-"

"AS I WAS SAYING – Even when about that other girl, the small emo one, the handbook legislates that fraternising with the living - whether on a tier of a romantic endeavour or otherwise, IT MUST be documented on YOUR behalf, Lawrence. It's a recently implemented rule."

You finally decided to speak up, "Wait, why would that need to be recorded?"

Juno sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose as she droned out "I know your tiny, living brain can't wrap your head around its complications so let me break it down for you: When a ghost and a living person love each other very much yadda yadda yadda - for an extended period - and it isn't classified as a haunting, but an "actual relationship" - the company I am associated with needs to take this information, as while the two worlds shouldn't breach – or at least it's not preferred – it is vital to note about your extensive knowledge of the dead which can be carried through into your file. The registration helps us recognise your awareness and will have you legally agree and abide by not abusing this info you now possess."

Juno almost sounded excited when she added on "BUT THE THING IS: You have already skipped the registration process and released the information~"

You tilted your head in confusion as you said slowly, "But I haven't done anything that goes against the conduct?"

Juno cleared her throat as a puff of smoke got released from the slit in doing so as she peered down at a clipboard she had manifested from the click of her fingers reading out loud "It says right here that "–a breather has been recorded publicizing information about the supernatural to various platforms of the media. Not only profiting off what they have captured but has triggered many people to start following in their footsteps which as caused a chain reaction of summoning's and seances throughout the district."

"But I haven't-" you tried to but in, but she firmly continued, "-And if I look at this little audit of the timestamps when this occurred- Oh! What's this? There was communication between a being of the dead and this breather – Hmm, well that's peculiar when I see Beetlejuice's record here, and his transit history of entering to and from the Netherworld... the times line up... perfectly? I think I'm going to connect the dots here, and-"

Fear shot down you spine as you attempted to defend your innocence "Please there must be a mistake- I didn't reveal what I knew to any media whatsoever! Beetlejuice tell her!"

You looked at Beetlejuice in hopes he could explain how you've done nothing wrong, but he seemed to be disconnected from this conversation entirely. His eyes were glassy, as he stared hard at the floor and you saw small droplets of sweat or something similar to be dotting his forehead as he was hard in thought, hands trembling as he rubbed them together. It was like an entirely different persona was next to you and unfortunately was no help.

Juno seemed to have been ignoring everything you just said as she was mumbling into the clipboard close to her face "Oh god, the clairvoyants and oracles are flipping out I'll have to deal with that later..."

She eventually pulled the board away and directed herself to you once again while tapping her long nails against the hardback of the board in a rhythmic motion, "Anyways, the facts don't lie, and I don't like to be told I'm wrong about things, fleshy. So, I'm giving you two options m'kay? And you should be grateful 'cause I never do this. You either one, come with me and face your prosecution, or two, I can let all this all slide and you can forget this ever happened, everything you've learnt and you can live your pathetic little life in solace, only if in trade I take the girl who is currently under my custody inside the house and she can stay in the Netherworld as she SHOULD have."

"Oh fuck, Lydia!" You blurted out, realising she would have been ambushed by Juno's goons when this encounter had occurred. You looked at Beetlejuice while trying to process what to do and it was almost nightmarish to see such a menacing figure standing beside you to look so defenceless and afraid.

You angrily shouted "FINE! I'll go with you willingly! Just leave her, Beetlejuice, the Maitland's and the Deetz' alone!"

Juno's hard, stern look contorted as the wrinkles threatened to pull into new places, bunching up as the corners of her mouth curled, displaying a stretched, cat-like smile. Her teeth were yellow from the staining of years of drinking coffee and you noticed specks of a dark maroon lipstick that must have transferred from her lips from a recent application.

Beetlejuice finally tuned back into reality after hearing your agreement and shouted "What- WHAT?! NO! MOM! TAKE ME INSTEAD! THIS IS ALL MY FAULT! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND-!"

Juno interrupted once again by stating "-Too late Lawrence. There's plenty of souls in the River of Styx. Maybe you could give that sweet girl you used to date a call! She was far better than this one."

Beetlejuice's hair flared up like fire as he went to attack Juno, but she put a hand up as her eyes glowed a bright white. With a demonic deep voice she said "ᙠǝǝʇlǝɾnıɔǝ! ᙠǝǝʇlǝɾnıɔǝ! ᙠǝǝʇlǝɾnıɔǝ!" and he was gone.

The last thing you saw was a goon come out of nowhere and hit you up side the head and a couple of blurry glimpses of the world around you.

One was being dragged down the halls with a loud trail of footsteps around you.

Another was seeing Lydia screaming and thrashing about with Adam and Barbara holding her back, fear-stricken and saddened looking at you. All you could hear was a buzzing noise like a dog whistle that drowned out all the distressed noises Lydia let out which you were almost thankful for because you were sure you would have started crying hearing it.

And the last one was seeing a large, imposing door that glowed a bright green that you saw Juno step into, followed by you being shoved into it.

And then nothing.