You Found Me

Part One

It all started on a cold day in November of 2012. I was riding the bus home from school and to say the least I was done. I got tired of this day as soon as I got to school. My life is full of fake friends. People who told me they'd be there for me but never were. And somehow I fall for it every time.

When the bus stopped by my house, I got my things together and walked up my driveway. Once I was inside, I shut myself in my room. I just wanted to be alone right now. I played some Mayday Parade and lay on my bed, scrolling through my Twitter feed.

I guess I had fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew, my mom was shaking me. "Jaden, it's time for dinner." She said. I groaned and got up. It seemed for a while like all my problems left me. But as soon as I got out of bed, it all came back to me and hit me like a pile of bricks. I rubbed my eyes and went into the kitchen.

After dinner, I went back into my room and texted my best friend Justin. I told him something I thought was funny. Turns out, he didn't think so. That's when shit went downhill. He basically blamed me for everything bad that ever happened to him.

I told him I was sorry and that I didn't mean to hurt him. But he didn't care. He deleted my number and then blocked and unfollowed me on everything. So that's when I lost my best friend. All in the span of an hour.

Being myself, I tend to overthink everything. It's not really something I can control. But that night, I couldn't sleep at all. I kept thinking that everything was my fault.

The next morning I felt kind of relieved. Even if the fight was my fault, I would no longer be blamed for everything that went wrong in Justin's life. I wasn't really okay though.

Fast forward a couple of weeks and there's been plenty of lies I've believed by people who I thought I could trust. I don't really like anybody at the moment, but I really want someone to hold me and love me forever. It sounds stupid, I know.

While getting ready for school one Monday morning, I heard a Fall Out Boy song on the radio. "My songs know what you did in the daaaaaark" I sang to myself. That's another thing about me. I love to sing. I tell people I'm a bad singer, but I'm actually pretty good. I put on a mint beanie after getting ready, and then I was out the door and on the bus.

Wow. I was actually kind of happy today. But little did my poor naive self know, that wasn't going to last much longer.