Identity

11. It'll Get Better

"What are you doing??" I asked with a puzzled look.

"I asked an old friend for advice," i'm not that old, "and she told me that music speaks louder than words, well, not really, but I think that's what she meant." He said then smiled again, showing a row of perfect white teeth.

"Clark, no, please, i've had enough trouble for today, I really need to rest." I pleaded.

This isn't going to end well.

"It's only for a while." He said while walking closer to me, getting his arms on a ready position to strum the guitar.

I looked at him, straight in the eye and said, "I like someone else.." I bluntly said. Clark's smile faded then his arms twitched.

"What??" He asked with a now confused look.

"I like someone else... Josh..." I paused.

What was his last name?!?

He stared at me. "Look, it doesn't matter, we were just friends, who happened to take it a little too far.. That's it." I said then walked past him. I didn't hear him make a move, it's like he just stood there like a statue. I suddenly heard something crash. I spun around and saw Clark smashing his guitar on the sidewalk. As if by instinct, I immediately ran to him and hugged him from behind.

"Clark! Stop it!! What are you doing?!" I asked, no response. I backed up and spun him around...

He was crying... I just stared at him. He wiped his cheeks with his backhand then spoke.

"It's doesn't matter, just like you said." He then walked past me then I heard him take out his keys from his pockets. I turned around and saw him turn at the curb, vanishing from my sight. I looked at his guitar then suddenly I felt something heavy on my chest, seconds later I was sitting on the sidewalk hugging my knees while holding on to Clark's broken guitar.

I heard footsteps coming towards me but didn't care enough to see who it was, it suddenly stopped.

"I'm guessing it didn't go as planned." Scott said with a sarcastic voice.

"That's what you get for fucking around with other people." I said then stood up and walked back towards the house. Scott grabbed my wrist.

"Hey, i'm sorry."

"You wouldn't have to be if you just minded your own fucking business in the first place." I scowled then shook his hand away. I walked back without saying another word. Tears flowing down my cheeks and I didn't even bother to notice on how hard I was holding the smashed guitar, my palms were dripping with blood.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

As soon as I got home, George looked at me with wide eyes.

"Please tell my that you're not going gangsta." He said, trying to lighten up the mood.

I walked towards him and gave him the biggest hug, he hugged me back. "I don't want to lie anymore." I cried, "it hurts! I just- I just stood their like an idiot! I broke his heart twice in one day!"

"It's alright," George said while rubbing my back, "just a few more days, then your free to do whatever you want." He assured me.

"Make it stop." I blurted.

"Make what stop?" He asked.

"The pain."

"Pain demands to be felt."

(A/N: Yeap, that's from TFIOS, credits to John Green :D)

I stepped back and smiled at him, "Not helping, but nice quote." I said while trying to stop the tears from escaping my eyes. "Seriously though, the bleeding isn't going to stop." I said then raised the hand that had the guitar on it.

George's eye's widened then laughed. "My goodness, let's go get the guitar fixed." He smiled then started to walk out the front door.

"I think my hand is more important!" I shouted.

"Oh yes, that too." He said. I laughed.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

~ June 23, 2014 Monday ~

"Will you be mine?" Josh asked. Cheers echoed in the hallways and at the corner of my eyes I saw Clark walking past us. Ignoring the fact that Josh asked me out.

Acting time.

I placed both my hands over my mouth and pretended to look shocked. "Josh.. I- I... Yes!!" I said excitedly then hugged him. The people around us cheered louder then I backed away and kissed him on the cheek.

Here's how it all started, I was on my way to the band room to jam for a little bit but then Josh cornered me then he started saying weird cheesy stuff, it was enough to attract enough audience and soon enough half of the people at school were cheering on for Josh.

I was on my way to the band room, hand in hand with Josh. He was holding on to my hand like I was going to fall off or something. As soon as we arrived at the band room, I noticed that it was empty. I motioned him to follow me to the little attic. When we got there I released my hand from his.

"What the hell??" I said bluntly.

"What?? You fallin' inlove with me yet?" He asked with a stupid smirk on his face.

"Yeah i'm falling, falling in deep shit!" I shouted at him.

"Well let's just say i'm that deep shit." He said, as if that's going to make it better.

"Do you think this is a joke?? I don't like you, i'm just doing this for the sake of this shitty school! I didn't even want to be here in the first place."

"Yet you're still here." He smirked.

"Says the guy who's way out of my league."

"Just so you know, you're a nobody, and if you want to win that little competition of yours, you need to stick with me. Now.. Where's that kiss??"

"Yeah, no. I'm done, i'm not doing this anymore." I said then started to walk towards the door, but before I got past him, he grabbed my wrist then pinned me to the wall. "The fuck are you doing?!" I shouted.

"I am going to get that kiss, whether you like it, or not." He hissed, his face inches away from me.

"Oh yeah??" I smirked then kneed him at the balls. He let go of my hands and grabbed his baby maker.

"You can't do this!" He said, now on his knees still holding his baby maker.

"I already did, oh yeah, I break up with you." I hurried down the stairs but Josh suddenly grabbed my waist. "The fuck?? I kicked your balls! Or maybe you didn't have any." I said trying to get out of his strong grip.

"Ha, you're gonna have to try harder than that." He said with a tone I didn't like, he grabbed my chin and pulled it upwards, my face was now inches away from his, again.

"Just let it happen, babe, I know you want to." He pressed his lips against mine, it was rough and forced, unlike Clark's, it was soft and comforting.

I tried to pull away but he was too strong, I heard the door open and Josh pushed me away. I bumped into the wall and fell on the ground, I breathed heavily, trying to catch my breath.

"What are you doing to her?!" I heard a high pitched voice. I looked up and saw Cate, glaring at Josh.

"If it isn't little miss unpopular, what are you even doing here??" Josh asked.

"I always go up here in the morning."

"Oh?? Is that so?? Do you come up here to talk to yourself?? Having no friends is hard, especially when they're you."

I glared at Josh, I stood up and went to Cate's side, "Just so you know, she has me, unlike you, you don't. You never will, never in a million years." I glared at him and held Cate's hand. "So if you don't want me to get you kicked out of school, you might as well forget the fucking plan my stepmonster made."

"Babe, even if you refuse, youre stepmonster will force you, just give it up, you'll never win." He smirked.

"We'll just see about that." I turned around and burst out the door, still holding Cate's hand.

It felt right.