Part Fourteen: Goddammit, Murphy

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I chugged Monty's moonshine as everyone worked, stumbling back towards my tent as I could hear Bellamy yelling orders in the distance

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I chugged Monty's moonshine as everyone worked, stumbling back towards my tent as I could hear Bellamy yelling orders in the distance.

"Come on. These foxholes aren't gonna build themselves!"

I rolled my eyes at his voice, feeling my chest clench a bit as I still loved the sound of his voice, even after he managed to break me down. "H-He's stupid with his gorgeous dark brown eyes, shaggy hair, a-and his freckles... oh man, his freckles are stupid," I slurred, tripping over my own two feet as I spilled my drink.

I pouted at liquid that was soaking into the ground, slowly sitting up as I reached for my cup when a gunshot went off, fear building up inside me. I scurry to my feet, leaving the cup on the ground as I stumbled out the gate and towards all the chattering.

"Hey!" Bellamy bellowed as I watched him walk up to the teen. "What the hell is the matter with you?!"

"I-I'm sorry, man, I fell asleep. I've been on watch all day," the teen muttered and I watched as Bellamy grip his coat, almost pressing him to the tree.

"We've all been on watch all day!" The freckled man yelled in the kid's face as I bit my lip, wanting to say something, but also don't want to give away that I'm completely wasted. "That bullet was one less dead grounder."

"Bell," Octavia muttered from beside him and my eyes dart over to her. "You're scaring people," she told him as Bellamy looked towards his younger sister.

"They should be scared!" He exclaimed, pushing the teen away from him a bit as he walked towards her. "The bomb on the bridge bought us some time to prepare, but that time is up!" He called out, looking at the abundance of people that stood in front of him, feeling myself get a little dizzy as I almost fell to the ground. "The grounders are out there right now, waiting for us to leave and picking us off one by one when we do! Clarke, Finn, Audrey, and Monty are gone, probably dead. And if you wanna be next, I can't stop you, but no guns are leaving this camp! This camp is the only thing keeping us alive! Get back to work!" Bellamy yelled, panting heavily as he walked away as my mind set on the one thing he said. Clarke, Finn, Audrey, and Monty... gone... probably dead.

A stagger of breath escaped my lips, backing away from everyone as both Blake siblings caught sight of me and I quickly turned around to go back into camp. No, no, no, no. I quickly made my way towards the alcohol, filling up a cup to the brim before chugging it, squeezing my eyes shut as the godawful taste slid down my throat.

"B, B! Hey, I think you've had enough," I heard Octavia tell me as I glanced back towards her, tears streaming down my cheeks, shaking my head.

"I-I wanna drink the pain away," I mumbled, finishing the glass as I went to fill it up when a hand grabbed mine. I could feel my lip trembling as I followed the arm, seeing Jasper standing beside me with a concerned look on his face.

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