Running Wild

Part Eight, Do It

In the morning Toby was sitting outside. I sat down next to him, eating what he left for me.
    "Are you feeling bet-ter?" He asked after a while and looked at me.
    "A bit." I continued with eating, but stopped as something came to my mind.
    "I'm sorry about yesterday, about the girl. I couldn't control myself. Is she your sister?" Suddenly he looked bothered, a bit sad if I wasn't mistaken.
    "No, Sally's-s just a f-friend." He looked down on his hands, stretching his fingers and clenching them into fists.
    "Sorry, it seems I do a lot of things wrong currently." I stabbed the waffle with my fork.
    "It was-s a long t-time ago." He said and looked again at me. "It all was." He continued.
    "You mean those guys?" He remained silent. It must have been a though time when he doesn't want to talk about it. I sighed and laid my head on his shoulder.
    "It's best I say nothing for the rest of the day." I said and he chuckled.

Just before lunch Toby head out, he didn't say where to or why. After some time, sitting around bored, I decided to go out too. I knew it wasn't that great of an idea, after all that happened. But staying still wasn't my thing.
As I walked through the green I heard something. Someone was running. I hid behind a tree and watched the scene. A girl was running, she always looked back while she ran, until she almost fell. But she continued. Suddenly something was thrown at her. My eyes opened further as I noticed it was a hatchet. It got stuck in her back and she fell on the ground. Toby was stomping over to her, annoyed and restless. He had his mouth guard pulled up and his goggled on. He took it out and hit her again. The two guys from before walked up to them, one of them was the one who shot at me. Toby walked away as soon as they arrived.
I followed him around, every time he attacked someone he got wilder, more aggressive and passionate. The fire was lit inside of him. He enjoyed every move.
Until late I watched him, the other two brought the corpse away and hung out a paper on one of the trees. Toby walked away, he laughed and shouted, he stopped in front of a tree and leaned on it. He hit it a few times before he calmed down. It was hard to overlook how much he suffered when he tried to calm down. He didn't want to, but he knew he had to.
Feeling guilty I left and went back to the cottage. I couldn't get that picture out of my mind, the look in his eyes every time he hit one of them. Every time he let it all out, his energy and his demons. He was so much stronger than me.
Sitting on the porch I waited for him. He took longer than I thought so I started throwing his knives against the tree in fron the the cottage. He had collected a few in his closet. Most of them were sharp, I sharpened the ones that weren't.
While I waited and polished them I got an apple and ate it outside, a few minutes later, Toby came. He looked at me and then at the tree I threw most of his knives at. I put the apple in my mouth and handed him one of them. He also threw it at the tree. It landed perfectly in the middle. I shouldn't have been surprised after I've seen him earlier that day.
As he came closer I wiped the blood off his cheek. I never thought we shared the same demons.
I came to know why he never feels lonely. He's never alone, he's surrounded by ghosts and shadows I've only ever seen in nightmares. I couldn't express my feelings for it all. I just stood there and looked at him, but I couldn't see him. I've only came back to reality as I felt lips on my own. He held the hand I used to wipe off the blood and kissed me.
    "Don't think too much." He said quiet, after we broke the kiss. He gave me a short kiss before he walked inside, leaving me dumbfounded on the porch. I didn't know what to do, so I started by pulling out the knives. I couldn't look him in the eyes for the rest of the evening. Dinner was quiet and awkward. As I was ready to go to sleep, I pulled Toby with me in the bedroom. I didn't want him to sleep on the couch any longer. I took off my clothes while he stood there wondering.
    "Come on, take off your clothes, you're going to sleep here with me." I felt guilty, needing to say that he would sleep in his own bed.
He did what I told him and we got in together. I was lying my side to face him, he also looked at me.
    "Would it be alright if I stayed a bit longer?" I asked him, thinking back when he wanted me gone as soon as I'm healed.
    "If you want to." I bit my lip and looked at him, then I pulled his face to mine and kissed him. He put his hand on my side and did the same. We slowly parted and I touched his forehead with my own. I caressed his cheek and smiled.

Every day after that, I felt like liking him even more. He showed me how good I could feel after I thought it wouldn't be possible anymore. I was happy, until he didn't come back. It's been two days and I haven't seen him. I was worried something happened, so I went to look for him.
I had been searching for hours but couldn't find him, but as I wanted to go home, I heard footsteps. Someone was running. Maybe it was a jogger, running too deep into the forest. Or running for his life. I decided to follow the steps. It was a 50-50 chance that Toby had something to do with it. And I was right, Toby was just about to ram his hatched into the man's face. I didn't think it'd disgust me so much to look at it.
He pulled out the hatchet, which was stuck from the cheek to the forehead in that head. It almost fell apart. While the blood ran out and formed a small puddle, Toby wiped off a piece of an eye from his weapon. Disgusted I looked at him, and as our eyes met, I could see the fire in his hazel ones. Pulling down his metal guard, he grinned at me, showing me how much he enjoyed it. He looked down on this poor man, and then at me, handing me his hatched.
    "Want to?" I was a bit shocked, it was something I used to live for and from, but I wanted to grow out of it. I didn't want to hurt people anymore. I was tired of it. He put it down and came closer, with a big smile he said;
    "You k-know, you don't h-have to b-be shy" I had to hold back, other way I would have slapped him. Step by step he came closer, until he stood right in front of me. I didn't want to look him in the eyes, it was dangerous.
Suddenly the warmth of a hand appeared on my hip. Then I felt a breath near my ear.
    "C-chop it off" his calm voice whispered. These words repeated until he made me hold the wooden grip of his hatchet. Feeling his lips on my neck made me shiver. He was different than else. He was more forceful.
    "Do it" It felt awfully familiar and with this attitude I didn't want to know what he would do if I'd say no. I gripped the arm that held onto me, to show him I'll do as he wants. I walked over to the dead man, raised the weapon and swung it with all my strength against the throat. I heard it cracking as some blood sprinkled on my face. I heard Toby coming from behind me.
    "Look at me." I turned around to look at him and his bloody, gloved hand raised my chin a bit further. His fingers wandered to my neck, and with his thumb he wiped off the blood on my cheek. I noticed that he stared at my lips, while he softly touched them. His lustful gaze wandered from my mouth to my eyes. Realizing what he did, his hand twitched before he took away.
    "Run." He said softly. I didn't need to hear more, he needed his space, he couldn't control himself. I went back to the cottage. But as I got there, it was eaten by flames. The whole house was burning. I didn't know what I should do, maybe I should wait for Toby, but the creepy laugh a few meters away from me told me not to. I ran away and never saw him again.