2 Thomas Sangster/ Newt Imagines& GIFs 2

10. Happy| Newt Pt. 2

Warning: A bit angsty and sad at the beginning.

Frypan approaches me slowly, an obvious friendly and sympathetic expression playing on his kind face.

“How are you, Y/N?” He asks me carefully, with the kind of tone you would use to talk to a scared child. Cautious, extremely sweet, pitiful and maybe a little condescending.

“Broken” I reply, my voice rid from any emotion.

Frypan frowned in sadness, but I was used to it already.

Before, I used to try and hide my emotions. Pretend that I was holding on, that I had hope and wasn’t actually as depressed as I felt. But it was all a lie.

I did it so my friends wouldn’t worry, so they wouldn’t look at me with those expressions I knew so well. With the helplessness and sadness plastered on their faces.

But I didn’t care anymore.

I was far too tired to care.

So I had started to be honest with myself as well as with my friends. I told them how I actually felt, and what I actually thought. Even if most of the time I didn’t feel like talking and would instead be evasive or not communicative at all.

I just needed to be alone. Have some privacy to be with my thoughts.

But that also implied dwelling on the pain. On my broken heart.

However, Thomas and Minho had grown accustomed to my behavior.

They obviously wanted to help me, but gave up. They couldn’t help me anyway.

There was nothing to do. No one could fix my broken heart.

“He probably didn’t suffer…” Murmurs my friend in a poor attempt to comfort me.

Still, there are many things on that sentence that bothers me.

First of all, he used the word ‘probably’, which meant that he knew he didn’t and he was just saying it even if he didn’t think so. Second of all, the fact that he had obviously lied and, last but not least, that he didn’t say his name as though it had become a taboo word.

“Newt suffered” I tell him simply. “He literally lost his mind, Fry, he suffered. I suffered, we all suffered”

I drop a huge exhausted sigh after I say those words.

Everything that happened feels so surreal, like it was only a dream. Like it’s far too horrid and painful for it to be actually real. It couldn’t have actually happened.

Newt being infected with the Flare. Falling in love with April. Losing his mind. Leaving me. Disappearing.

Getting my heart broken by the boy I love and my best friend.

It makes me think about Newt’s fate.

Has he completely give into the Flare? Is he a Crank now? Is April? Are they still together? Where are they?

Is he even alive?

Despite being pain inducing, I can’t shove those thoughts away.