Are You Awake?

|A captor of undesired possessions|

For the first time in however long Cari was able to remember, she had only been able to put such a harsh word as hate on two things; fake, forced smiles no one really wanted to send her way, but felt they had to and her own body. That was it. More she didn't feel deserved more than a strong dislike. But as she woke up on her bathroom floor with the worst ache in her back she could comprehend Monday morning and tried her best to make sure her mother knew everything was just as it usually was – that the heat inside Cari's mind wasn't currently trying harder than ever to cook her porridge in record time, the blonde girl found that she probably had a new part of her life she was able to stick a sticker with hate written on it in black, bold letters on.

She wasn't completely sure what that part was yet though, but imagined a pair of scissors as she saw her hate be manifested in front of her eyes – a pair of scissors of which had so quickly and so easily cut everything that was Shannon in her life, and first chucked it out the window then ignited it in front of her eyes.

It wasn't only the extent she knew of Saturday night either, that the scissors had been able to cut. She knew they had cut right through her and the mysterious texter's connection, that much had they made apparent the night prior. But she hadn't been aware that they had been able to reach all the way into the real world, too, and cut the pair of welcoming, warm blue eyes out of her life as well. But that much became obvious as Cari quietly walked from her mother's car and towards the main entrance a few minutes later than she usually did, her back having given her trouble as she tried getting off the floor after her alarm went off, seeing Shannon walk right past her. And if that wasn't obvious enough, as Shannon could have just not been observant enough to recognize her from behind in the early hours, those scissors had to make sure Cari was completely aware of their doing, seemingly pushing Shannon's head around as the brunette went to enter the building, her eyes catching Cari's in an instant, only for them to leave them the same moment, as if Cari's brown eyes somehow burnt her blue ones. Just as quickly, was Shannon speed-walking around the first corner she could reach, out of Cari's sight.

So, to say Cari was aware the connection she had been made comfortable enough to create with the blue-eyed girl, by the encouraging smiles she had received from three girls she until today had just, in her mind, started to consider her friends, was broken, would be an understatement. And up until lunch, all her mind had been focused on, besides trying to cook her porridge – seemingly only able to fry the bottom into an image of a pair of scissors with dark, bold letters covering its blades – was the fact that she had most likely managed to cut all her recently made connections, leaving her, again, with nothing more than her need of a way to get out of her own skin, an immutable sea trapped inside her own mind and mirrors punching her gut harder than any student trying ever could. The scissors had to have taken the freedom to do so. Which, as lunch came about, just had the blond girl take her time to get out of the classroom, making her way towards the cafeteria, even with the knowledge of just where that would send her – straight to the floor, pushed up against a wall.

It didn't take more than a few minutes until she was there either, with no desire, what so ever, to even try to brace herself from the impact of the amount of hands colliding with her body at once, probably marking her skin to match her, still, quite red mark right above her eyebrow, from dropping her phone a few days earlier. Shannon had confirmed their claims the night before, so why even try letting herself deny it? Cari just let them mark her body as she sat there, mentally writing a spiteful, four-letter word across the blades of the pair of scissors currently burning themselves to her mind, just to remind her what huge mistake she had made by believing there was only one human out there – just one – who hadn't been affected enough by the cruelty today's shallow and more-than-superficial world had become.

You should have known the backlash was coming, her mirrors had told her before she left for school. It's karma, they had said. Had she just known the extent of their words went so far ahead of a sore back and a lost contact saved on her phone.