|| Wolf's Bane || The Order || Hamish X Reader ||

Release

(Not gonna lie I kind of felt weird writing the first part. Don't worry children, nothing adult happens!)

I had one fucking rule.

One rule. No kissing.

Yet there I was, my hands in his hair and my body against the wall. I'm not saying I didn't enjoy it, but things were different. This wasn't like when we usually fooled around. This was deeper, it meant something. From the wall to the bed, hands everywhere, searching and grasping. Our lips never parting as we struggled to get undressed.

Then, he stopped. I was straddling his waist (both of us in our underwear), and as I pulled away, he spoke. "I've been meaning to say this for a while, I just never knew if it was the right tim-" I stopped him with my lips. I knew what he was trying to say. I knew that if I let him say it I'd either have to lie to him or leave him. I couldn't bring myself to do either.

He kissed me back and rolled me over. He straddled me now, his hands softly pinning my arms to either side. He pulled away again, slightly out of breath. "No, you need to hear this...I think that I love you," He gave me a goofy smile and released my arms. His hands caressed my face and he stared at me. "You don't even know how much you mean to me..." His smile faded, "I know that this is just you using me to get over Tyler's death...I know that, but I can't help but fall for you." his voice was so weak and needy.

I placed my hands on top of his and pulled them from my face. "Please, don't do this" I begged and he rolled off of me, laying on his back. He ran a hand through his hair. "I thought maybe you felt something..."

"I don't know what I'm feeling, but I know it isn't love. I can't-."

"Why? I've done everything I could. I make you laugh, I willingly gave myself to you even though I knew I was being used, I even agreed to your fucking no kissing rule. You wanted me at the bar, a few months ago. What changed?"

"Everything changed! I'm sorry. This can't happen anymore, never again."

I changed clothes and for the first time in over a month I entered my room. Hamish stayed in his room, quiet while he thought. I took this as the perfect time to start my 'plan'. It wasn't much of a plan honestly. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with Hamish before I did it, but I was naive. It was only gonna hurt him more when I died. Yes, I said died. So much for a story with a happy ending...

I gathered a change of clothes just incase I did make it out, but I knew I wouldn't make it. I grabbed two knifes, a few spells wouldn't get me out alive but it might help me get inside.

This all started because of a note. It appeared in my pocket one day last week.

Dear (Y/L/N),

I know you want revenge for Tyler

but we found a spell that can turn you back.

Come to us willingly and we'll help you.

With love,

Your Magus

Of course its a trap, but I was going anyway. Not because I wanted to be normal again, but because I wanted them to pay. I wanted to hurt them in everyway possible. I was reckless and stupid, but I didn't care. When I first joined, Hamish explained that we as The Knights of Saint Christopher were meant to protect good people from evil magic and those that perform it. This is helping. This is ridding the world of a few more monsters. Including myself.

It was surprisingly easy to sneak out. No one else was home but Hamish. It was better for him not to know what happened to me. I was the only wolf The Order truly knew about anyway. I made my way to the temple, it wasn't guarded, not until I got in. Several members surrounded me all with knives at the ready.

Fuck.

Hamish's POV:

I awoke in bed to the sound of Lilith banging on my door. "What the hell?" I must've fallen asleep when (Y/N) left. I rubbed my eyes as got dressed. She continued shouting until I opened the door. "She's gone! Hamish we have to go help her. She's committing suicide!" I immediately straightened up. "Where?" I questioned, moving past her.

She followed me out of the house, recounting what she saw. "I was leaving my class and headed here when I seen her. She stormed right past me but I could tell something was off. She went into the old building on campus. She didn't even hear me say her name. Hamish, I seen a knife sticking out of her bag..." Lilith rushed to catch up with me.

I rushed into the campus, with Lilith on my trail. It wasn't a long walk but with a life on the line it felt like forever. On the way I couldn't help but feel this was my fault, on so many levels. I made her one of us, I rejected her, let Tyler die, and I didn't see the signs. She must've been in more pain then she was letting on. I ruined her life. Lilith went in front of me as we approached the door. "I'll call Randall and tell him to bring a first aid." she placed a hand on my shoulder before stepping aside and dialing on her phone.

I wasn't waiting, not anymore. When I entered the first thing I noticed were the bodies, then her. She moved effortlessly, sliding around, knife in hand. People were either in flames, thrown across the room or bleeding out. I was awestruck, she hadn't even shifted yet. She was blazing a path through everyone. It wasn't her committing suicide, it was her attacking The Order. Which might as well have been the same thing. Goddammit.