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Lucifer x reader - Why do you even care?

But since you met the Winchesters a year and a half ago, you thought you had changed. They helped you with your previous depression and showed you that you are indeed worth something. You began to see the
positive aspects about yourself and you even started talking more again,
something you quit down drastically once your depression started.
No matter how pathetic it sounds, you even searched in the internet for ways to get and keep friendships because of your fear of losing them again. It was a hard time for you but until now you thought you succeed. You thought you finally found a way to be less unlikeable but right now you weren’t so sure.

When was the last time Sam or Dean told you specifically that they liked you? Or laughed about a joke you made? When was the last time one of them wanted to spend some time with you but without the
other brother? Would it really be this bad to spend some time with you alone?

You were so in thoughts you didn’t even noticed how
hysterically you started crying. Every single conversation with the brothers
and Cas played again in your mind’s eyes. So many times you had the chance to say something funny or cool or at least something helpful but each and every time you managed to fuck up.
How could you think they truly liked you? How could you think anyone was able to like you? In this
moment you realized how stupid you really were. For weeks you tried to start a conversation with Lucifer, an archangel. He didn’t decide not to answer because he had a reputation to keep or something like that. Lucifer didn’t answer because
he would rather be lonely before befriending someone as pathetic as you.

The next two weeks you barely left your room. Of course Sam and Dean asked you what’s wrong but you trivialized it and told them you just didn’t feel well. At first it seemed like they bought it but as the days passed they grew more and more worried about you. It was obvious that
something was wrong. Normally you cooked pie for Dean and told Sam anything about the new book you rode but that stopped abruptly.

Surprisingly, the Winchesters weren’t the only ones who were concerned about you. Lucifer registered your change in behavior too. And despite his efforts, he couldn’t deny the feeling of guilt. Never before
did he feel something like that but after he saw your empty look every time you mustered up the strength to leave your room he couldn’t stop it.

At first the devil tried to ignore his regret and shame. It wasn’t his fault that you took everything personal after all but to be honest he kind of missed your attempts talking to him. You were the only one who ever treated him with nothing but kindness. Even when he ignored you, you tried your best to make him
feel at home in the bunker. You showed him around shortly after he arrived, you brought him new beddings and shower gel (not that he actually needed it) and one evening he found a list with book recommendation for him.
But he never thanked you for anything you did for him.

One day he heard the brothers talking about you. Normally, he would just ignore dumb and dumber but this was about the only
human he actually tolerated.
“Dean, we need to talk to her. She isn’t herself. When was the last time she ate something?”
“I don’t know, Sammy. No matter how often I try to talk to her she just shut down. It’s just like back then.”
“Yeah, it seems like her depression is indeed back.But this time it seems to be even worse. We need to think about something.”
They continued talking about a plan to make you open up to them but Lucifer stopped listening. You were depressed and it’s his
fault. You felt just fine before he arrived and while you were the best thing that ever happened to him he was your worst.

He didn’t know how to make it up to you but he knew he would have to try if he wanted to stop the guilt eating him up.
Once he knocked at your door he didn’t get an answer from you. After a few tries he decided to just get in but what he saw shocked him. The meals Sam brought in your room three times a day were left untouched.
You laid in your bed surrounded by tons of used tissues and you looked like you spent the whole time crying.

“Hey (y/n), are you alright?” The moment he asked you he
noticed how stupid this question was but he never really had this kind of
conversation before.
Much to Lucifers dismay you didn’t even look his way let alone answered him. Hesitantly, he made his way to your bed and sat down
next to you.
“Listen (y/n), I’m…I’m sorry, okay?” “Why?”
“What do you mean with “Why”? I’m sorry because I shouldn’t have said what I said.”
“Why?” You finally looked at him. “You just said the
truth. You don’t have to apologize for that.” His heart shattered by your
words. You sounded so hurt, so convinced his words were true. That’s the moment he truly realized how much he fucked up.

You lowered your eyes, you just couldn’t look at him.
Therefore, you weren’t able to see the remorse in his.
“Yes, I do need to apologize because I didn’t mean it. You were just so nice and seriously that kind of overwhelmed me. You aren’t
boring or a burden to anyone.”
That was the moment you couldn’t hold back any longer.
You thought it wasn’t possible to cry any more than you already did but apparently
you were wrong.
“Stop it, Lucifer! Did Sam and Dean sent you? Is that
the reason you’re here? You don’t need to lie to me. I know exactly how I am. I will never be the person people like to spend time with. No one wants someone like me. It doesn’t matter how much I tried I was never someone’s first choice to spend time with and I never will. I should probably just leave. I wasted enough of your all’s time. It was stupid from me to believe you could like me the
way I like you. I’m sorry for that.”
Your last words were nothing more than a whisper.

Before Lucifer could say anything else you stood up and searched for a bag that is big enough for all of your clothes. You didn’t know where to go but you knew you couldn’t annoy all of them more than you already had.
After Lucifer noticed what you planned he began to panic. There was no way he would let you leave like that.
“Wait,” he begged while he stood up to get a hold of your hand. “Don’t leave.”
At first you thought it’s a new way to make fun of you. Maybe he just tried to make you believe him before he burst into laughter for you being naïve. But when you looked him in the eyes again you saw nothing
but sincerity in them. Did he really want you to stay? No that couldn’t be,
right? It wasn’t like someone like him could ever like you back.

“Sam and Dean didn’t send me. They don’t even know I’m here right now. Listen (y/n), you’re the only tolerable human I met so far and I really don’t know how to survive with the Losechesters without you.”
“Is this some kind of trick, Lucifer? What makes you think I would believe you? Everything you did was ignoring me after all,” you
half-shouted at him.
You were tired of guessing what’s going on in the devil’s
head.
“I know what I did wasn’t fair. I promise it won’t happen again but please stay. I’m begging you.”
To say you were shocked was an underestimation.
Lucifer, the Lucifer begged you to
stay. For a few minutes you just stared at him wide-eyed, considering your
options.
Lucifer noticed your inner conflict, so he did something he never thought he would ever do. He hugged you. And to say it was awkward would be generously phrased.
“Don’t go, alright?”

You couldn’t do anything but shaking your head yes because you were still to perplex to say anything. Minutes ago you wanted to leave everything you built up behind and now the devil himself was hugging you so you won’t leave. Could this whole situation get even more confusing?
“Why do you even care? I’m a no one. Just a pathetic little human that can’t do anything right. I’m just…”
But before you were able to continue Lucifer shushed
you.

“Because I like you too.”