It's My Fault

Chapter 14

I parked my car in the driveway and tried to wipe my tears away but it was no use, they just kept coming. I got out of the car and went inside to my room to leave my stuff and grab my headphones. Plugging them into my phone I left the house again turning up my music and started my walk to my special spot. I let the tears run down my face and when I reached the covering I moved them out of the way and walked to my rock. I continued to listen to my music when I sat down and stared out into the water. I should of listened to Rose that day. Then the accident would of never happened. Shaking my head I looked down, "I'm so sorry." Tears were falling at a fast rate and I simply let them and moved to lay back so I was looking up at the sky. I closed my eyes and let myself get lost into the music and after who knows how long my phone started to ring. I ignored the call and continued to listen to my music. Only when it was getting dark was when I opened my eyes again. Sitting up I ran a hand through my hair and got off my rock starting my walk to my mom. When I had gotten there it was already 8 but I didn't let that stop me from going to visit my mom. I sat down in front of her tombstone, took off my headphones, and started crying again, "Hey mom. I am seriously blaming myself right now. For everything. For you and the accident. Everything is my fault." I felt a cold hand on my shoulder and flinched. I relaxed when I looked up with tears in my eyes at Rose. She didn't say anything but crouched down and pulled me into a hug. I leaned into her and looked over her shoulder to my mom's stone.

After some time I finally stopped crying and it was too dark to see anything. Rose stood back up and I stood up as well. She leaned into me and held my arm. "Come on Ellie we need to go home." She put her arm around me and I looked back at my mom's gravestone, "See you later mom." I looked at the stone next to hers but quickly looked away. Rose lead us out from the back way because we both knew the front gates were locked shut. I leaned into Rose the whole way home and she simply held me not saying anything. She knew my thoughts were not the best at the moment. "When we get to your house we can cuddle on your bed. Sound good?" I nodded and leaned more into her shivering. We got to my house around 11 and my dad hadn't come home from the restaurant yet but I was glad he couldn't see me like this. We went into my room and I changed into a big hoodie and short shorts. Rose changed into her hoodie that I took from her and some basketball shorts. I climbed into bed first and turned off the light. I faced the wall while Rose cuddled into the back of me. Her cool body against mine helped me fall asleep faster. The next morning Rose was gone but the clothes she used were folded on the edge of my bed. I sat up and scretched feeling a lot better. Thank the lord tomorrow is Friday. I ran a hand through my hair and got up to change. Changing I put on a pair of dark jeans and a white graphic T-shirt and walked out to the bathroom to brush my hair and teeth.

Walking out to the kitchen I saw my dad on his phone. He looked up at me and asked, "So what's this I hear about you ditching your last classes yesterday?" I looked down at the floor and simply said, "Triggers." He nodded slowly and I grabbed a fruit. "I am going to head out early. I'll see you later dad." I walked around the island to hug him and grabbed my stuff, I figured I would walk to school today. Rose was unexpectedly outside the door waiting for me, "I was not expecting you to be here." We started walking and she said, "I had to make sure you were okay. Although I do apologize for not being there when you woke up. I left to go and get ready for school." I nodded and we started our walk to school.

Flashback
The football team has been shoving me more often. They mock me and then walk away like nothing happened. The only difference is that when they pushed me to the ground Rose was standing next to me. I was quick to pick my stuff up and walk away but Rose had other ideas. "Hey dickwads what's your problem?" Their laughter quickly stopped and the head player walked right in front of Rose. She stood tall and I walked over to her and held onto her arm. She clenched her fists and the head player poked her shoulder. "Whats got your panties in a bunch hm?" His friends were smirking behind him. Knowing Rose, she gets very protective and I knew they were pushing her buttons. "What's your problem with her huh! Just because she doesn't fight back you pick on her! You just need to somehow find a way to fill your nonexistent egos." All of their smirks fell and they started to get angry. "Ro come on let's go." She looked over at me and the head player said, "Yeah listen to your pathetic girl-" He wasn't able to finish that sentence because Rose punched him in the face. His head whipped back and his nose started to bleed. Satisfied with what she did she grabbed my hand and dragged me away.

I smiled slightly at the memory and Rose looked over at me. "What are you smiling at?" I shrugged and saw the school coming up, "When you made the head football player's nose bleed from punching him in the face." She quickly started laughing, "I can't believe you still remember that. That was what, sophomore year?" I nodded and she lightly hit my arm which made me look over at her and smile. She smiled back and you could hear the laughter and chatter from the students. Rose and I both sighed but continued to walk to the school. "I'll see you later Ellie." I nodded to her and she walked away while I walked to my locker and saw Grace leaning against it. She was looking down at her phone typing something so when I got closer I cleared my throat and she looked up smiling. She pulled me into a hug which I gladly reciprocated. "Hey Ellie." I smiled into the hug, "Hey Grace." We let go and I turned to my locker. I took stuff out and put stuff in and then the bell rang. After school Grace wanted me to go over so when I saw Rose after school I told her. She nodded and encouraged for me to go. I simply laughed and waved at her before following Grace to her car.