While You Were Busy Being Heterosexual, We Studied The Blade. (BNHA Chatfic)

Ch. 22- Cat Cafés and Crippling Crushes

I also think I'm some sort of cat whisperer, because the majority of the cats immediately trotted up to me and began to rub themselves against my legs, my arms, some of them jumped up and rubbed against my cheeks and my hands in my lap. Oh my god this is heaven. Or is this hell? I mean... I don't have enough hands to pet all of them at once. I'm trying my best to distribute the pets equally, but fuck man, I feel so bad. What I wouldn't give to have Shouji's quirk right now... he's so lucky, he can pet all the cats.

At this point I'm kind of... laying on the floor, completely covered by the cats. You can't even see my body, it's just a big lump of cats on the floor all meowing and purring. They're kind of restraining me as I pet them, wrapping around my legs and arms, clinging to my wrists and plopping their faces as close to my hands as they can get. A lot are curled up on my chest and just sleeping. Then, I hear the shoji screen door slide open again.

"Uh... Shinsou?" I hear Ojirou's voice. Oh, wonderful, I'm now surrounded by my two most favorite things in the world.

"Hey." I see, my voice intensely muffled by the cats, Ojirou lets out a little yell. I start laughing almost uncontrollably, but I can't move too much because cats.

"Oh Jesus Christ... I didn't even see you!" He laughs along with me and I hear his footsteps walk up beside me, splitting the sea of cats.

"Help, they've piled on top of me."

"I guess you could say you're caught in a...catpile. Like, a dogpile, but with....cats."

"Ojirou, I can't breathe."

"What? Cat got your lung?"

"Ojirou this is not a laughing matter."

"Why can't you just lift them off of yourself?"

"I mean, physically I could, but emotionally? Imagine the toll."

"Fiiine.." I hear a more clear voice as the cats are slowly stripped and peeled from my body, most of them, once they were removed, go behind Ojirou to immediately play with his cat toy-like tail. The only one that stayed with me was a white and blonde munchkin kitten. They had occasional little spots of lemon over their white fur, mostly on their chest, top of their head and stomach, and the entire tip of their tail was blonde. They remind me of someone, but who...

"I could use this as a weapon." Ojirou says and lifts his tail in front of my face, revealing that it, too, was covered in cats. Like a fluffy war hammer. Then, I respond without missing a beat, but I really wish I did.

"I'd let you beat me with it."

"....Shinsou-"

"wAIT nO I TakE it BaCK."

"You can't take back what's already been said! You're kinky!"

"nOOOo-"

"We should probably tell everyone we're back here."

"Yeah."
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Ojirou and I sat next to eachother at the table, the cats playing with his tail and occasionally biting or scratching at it, you could see the tears hold back on his face, It was kind of funny. No Shinsou that's sadistic and bad. Lmao fuck your opinion inner voice.