The Bitch You Killed

Chapter Thirteen

  "Same old Tyler," I said, mocking the words he had used earlier.

We fell into a comfortable silence as we just stared at each other again. Absent-mindedly, Tyler reached his hand out to play with a lock of my hair. This simple action probably caused almost all of my nerves to explode as my heart went into overdrive.

I'd feel sick if this had happened with anyone else other than Tyler, what can I say? He brings out that side in me. Pathetic, I know.

  "You always had the prettiest hair I'd ever seen on a girl. I remember the first time I really got to look at your hair up close. That sounds really creepy but I remember being at the play park with you a little while after I had got the all clear with my leg. You wanted to go on the swing set and I decided to push you and the sun was shining so bright that day. Anyway the sun was shining onto your hair and it was the weirdest thing 'cause strands of your hair were sparkling almost. Whatever way the sun caught them, your hair was shimmering as you were flying through the air on that swing and I remember exactly what I was thinking.

  'I wonder what shampoo she uses.'"

Throughout Tyler's heartfelt talk about my hair, which if I'm honest had managed to almost melt me into a puddle onto the floor which is so clichéd but so true, I had been listening intently and I was so shocked by the ending that I snorted.

Real cute Khloe.

  "Why do you always make me behave like some dork? I just snorted because of you — teenage girls don't snort," I stated.

  "Well I happen to think that that was really cute," Tyler replied, our gazes meeting as he still twirled that lock of hair around his finger.

The tension in the air grew and we both knew what was coming.

Tyler leaned in as I tilted my neck back so that we were now face to face. He stepped closer so that his knee was between both of mine as I was still perched on his kitchen table. His lips came incredibly close to mine at such a slow rate that in my desperate need to confirm that things were going to be okay between us, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into a kiss.

It was one of the best kisses I had ever experienced in my life, and that's definitely an achievement as if you can remember, I had kissed almost the entire football team.

Maybe it was because I actually had feelings for Tyler.

To me, it's so weird how something like 'emotions' can affect how enjoyable displays of affection are. I'd kissed plenty of boys, and I could always tell if they were good, bad or just downright gross. I had been the victim of many bad experiences with drunken kisses including the one I liked to refer to as the "flush". I think that about sums it up, just not a pleasant experience for me anyway.

Another horrid experience was the drunken college guy I kissed a few months ago. I had fought with Caleb at some college party and I ended up completely off my face and pressed against a wall by this stunningly attractive guy.

If only you could judge a person by their looks and know if they were going to be a bad kisser, it would save so much heartache.

So anyway, I was actually enjoying the small pecks this guy was giving me and then it happened.

He literally sucked my tongue into his mouth, I was so shocked I was convinced he was going to end up sucking my fucking tonsils in with it and the idea made me gag.

I ended up gagging into his mouth before pushing him off of me and legging it to the bathroom to vomit.

All I remember thinking as I threw up was:

'That took tonsil tennis to a whole new level.'

I will always be thankful that Tyler was a good kisser.

I will also always be thankful that I never bumped into a frustrated college dude looking for another round of tonsil tennis, or his equivalent.

###

It was late before we were disturbed, after midnight probably.

What disturbed us was a strange noise from Tyler's backyard which happened to be located outside the kitchen.

We were basically still in the same position from when we starting our make out on the kitchen table.

Always classy; never trashy.

It sounded like someone had slammed the backyard gate which led from the garage.

  "What was that?" I asked.

  "Sounded like the gate, I know I locked it when I came in this evening though because my friend's dog is staying in the backyard. Didn't want him to get out, you know?" He replied.

  "Right, well it was probably nothing," I said, faking a small laugh.

Truth is I was worried, I had not forgotten that I was still in a relationship with Caleb and here I was, sucking face with Tyler.

Not exactly a great thing to be caught doing when I have a boyfriend.

  "Maybe I should go check it out anyway?" he asked, rubbing his hand along my arm in a way that was supposed to be comforting, probably sensing my apprehension.

  "No I'm sure it's nothing, I'd go let the dog in though, not fair for him to be out all night," I replied, trying to change the topic and quite obviously failing.

   "Yeah, I guess," he said before turning around and heading for the back door.

As he disappeared into the night, calling for the dog as he closed the door, I remarked on how awkward the atmosphere had been since the kiss and then the reality of the situation hit me.

I had Tyler back.

The thought made my heart beat crazily in my chest. It was like a way of telling me that everything was going to be okay. I was going to be okay.

And that's when I got a sign that no; everything wasn't going to be fucking okay.

Because realistically, when was anything every fucking okay when it involved me?

***

word count for the chapter; 1,702

A/Nso hey, sorry for the reaaallly late update but i've been reaaallly busy lately with school cause i was off sick for a few days and it's just been really hectic trying to catch up.

as well as that, just want to say that as usual, i haven't properly proofread this and i'm very sorry for that.

i've also decided to dedicate this chapter to one of my best friends, kate.

she's hella rad and she encouraged/threatened me so this update is for her.

i also would like to ask if there is any bands that you could recommend for me to listen to cause i'm kinda bored of all the stuff i've been listening to so far :(

as always,

thanks,rachel // longtimegonex