The Bad Boy with a Heart of Gold

✖ Chapter 20 ✖

I pulled back, sucking in air like I'd been drowning. And in a way that was exactly what had happened. I'd drowned in him.

I managed to not look at his face as I turned around and left the gym. I squeezed my eyes against what felt like glaring brightness in the hallway. I was proud that my legs worked. I was not proud of the goosebumps all over my skin, or the way my heart felt like it was hiking up my throat.

I felt his hand on my bare shoulder and stopped. The hold was loose enough that I could have walked away from the touch. But I couldn't.

My throat worked for a couple of seconds until it was able to produce raspy, uneven sound. "What are you doing to me, Sawyer?"

"I'm trying not to be your friend," he said, deep voice just as broken as mine. His other hand joined and together they blazed a trail down my arms. I felt him step up against me and his breath fanned against my neck as he said, "You try to push me away, but I still flock to you like a moth to flame."

I couldn't stop the shiver as his lips pressed hot kisses against my neck.

"But if you say that your reputation is more important than this-" He made a pause where his tongue had a taste of the crook of my neck, leaving a wet patch before he applied tingling suction. And then he stepped back, leaving me cold and stunned even as I stared at the row of lockers in front of me.

"Then," he continued. "Just say so and I'll leave you alone. I won't try to coerce you into something if you don't want it."

My breath was coming up short. No matter how much my lungs tried, they just couldn't find oxygen. The tingling he'd caused all over my body was now concentrated behind my eyelids while they worked to hold back tears that suddenly wanted to spill. Part of me knew what he was doing. He was trying to use my body as his playground, and I was mad that I'd let him and enjoyed it, even. I was mad that I still wanted to turn around, grab his head and crash my lips against his once more.

But he was giving me an out, and even if it killed me I was going to take it. He may want to have fun with me now, get a repeat of that incendiary kiss or even more.

This wasn't going anywhere good, though. I had a plan. Get into business school, ace college, come back home with a fabulous diploma that would put the family business in the map. Sawyer Logan was the perfect ingredient to derail all that. I'd spent years resisting him and I knew that if I caved now, I would regret it. Because soon after I did, the thrill of the chase would be over for him and he'd realize that deep down I was too much for what he actually wanted. After all, I wasn't one of those girls who'd go make graffitis about what he could do with his appendages.

Still facing away from him, my fists squeezed at my sides, I whispered, "We can't ever be friends. Or anything else."

"Okay," he said softly, and I felt him lift up a strand of my hair. "I guess this is goodbye, then."

I turned, intending to laugh it off. It wasn't like we'd never see each other again. He was everywhere. At school, at the shop, even randomly appearing in family situations. But that caught in my throat as he kissed my hair and let it stream between his fingers, shoulders slumped and face down like...

Like he really cared.

"I'm still your tutor," I whispered, wishing I could take back the whole night. The whole week. So that we'd go back to mostly ignoring each other and pretending what simmered between us was hate.

His eyes lifted just enough to pin me.

"Aurora," he started, and by the fact that he used my name—not princess, not Rory—I knew I was in for some damage as he continued, "You may be practiced in holding yourself from who you really are and what you really feel. I can't. I've barely fooled everybody from realizing how much I like you."

My eyes widened.

He shrugged, grim. "God knows why, because you're no good to me."

"I-" but that was as far as I got, because I didn't know what to say.

Sawyer's throat worked a hard swallow and then he said, "So, you're right. Let's just forget this whole thing ever happened. Go back to your fairy land and I'll slink back to the dark and... let you go."

Yet, he was the one who left me standing in the hallway by myself. And even though we had made a new agreement, I knew that everything had changed.

also we're hitting the halfway mark omg, so many things yet to happen 😳

but also, how about this chapter's revelations?!