Peter pan's lost girl

Chapter 37

Peter's POV

(9 years later)

She laid in her hospital bed. She was silent. It was like she was under the sleeping curse again, except this time she will never wake up. I left the room feeling empty. I corrected my mistake from the past and attended her funeral. At the end of the of the ceremony I looked around hoping to find mermaids trying to attack the barrier. hoping that I was just having a flashback. the only thing that snapped me back into reality was rumple crying quietly beside me.

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I can't keep my mind off of her. I should've saw it coming. She had gotten terribly sick. she died at such a young age, 30. I couldn't help, but think that she could've lived longer if we stayed on Neverland.

I suggested that we move back to Neverland, after we lived here for about a year. But she refused. she wanted to have a child and "a child, can't have a child" she was only seventeen when she said that. She waited till she was 21, then we decided to have a Rumple. I asked her the question again but she said she wants him to grow.

I started to drink the pain away, for the first year without her. When I wasn't drinking I was thinking. It's his fault that she's dead. If it wasn't for him we could've been living together forever in Neverland. I had thoughts of leaving Rumple in someone else's care while Michelle and I live in Neverland so that he can grow then live with us later, but she would never agree to that.

During the second year I stopped blaming him and blamed myself. I should've never stopped her from trying to kill Cynthia. I should've killed her myself. Then there wouldn't be a reason for us to leave the island. Then I tried to think of where my life was now. all I got were a bunch of negatives that over powered the positives.

I don't understand her logic. She could've lived. She could've cured herself with her magic, but she wanted "to live a normal life". I also think that she figured she would see her mom. after the war, Michelle never spoke to her mother after that. The book was gone, there was no other way for her to communicate with her. So many thoughts ran through my head.

Did she not want to stay with me? she never cut herself again, she seemed fine. I became obsessed with finding a way back to Neverland. Michelle may've been prepared to die, but I'm not.

I started to con people, hoping that I can find a way back to Neverland. I would leave Rumple with the midwives and tell him that I was looking for a job. one day he caught me. He looked upset. Then he showed me the magic beans. If I seemed to eager to use them then Rumple would know that something was up.

I played it off like I would sell them. then he had the idea to go somewhere else, where no one knows us, "a fresh start". He asked me where we should go and I knew exactly where but I came up with a quick story about my dad selling me to a black smith and how I would dream of going to Neverland.

I didn't feel bad about lying to him. I threw the bean and we jumped through the portal. After being there for a while I tried to fly, but I forgot that I needed fairy dust. I tried to get Rumple to climb the tree,but he's such a wuss. I climbed the tree finding a flower. I picked up some dust and sprinkled it over my head. nothing happened.

The shadow of the island came, I asked him why wouldn't the fairy dust work. he told me it was because I don't belong here. I knew what he meant. Neverland is for children, I can be a child again if I believed I can. I couldn't though, there was one thing holding me back.

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A/N

This isn't the last chapter

Sorry for the long wait, I'll try to update again sometime this week

I know I said that last time, but I'm sure I will this time.

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thanks,
MsSterling