I Found What I Was Missing

Chapter 48: The War, Part 4/The Finale

It looked a lot like Gon's Ja-Janken, but it was completely black and much more powerful. Was she going to use it on him?! Killua moved to stand, nearly collapsing at the pain he felt, but he bit his lip until it bled and endured the pain; he had to move, he had to get out of there.

“Killua!” Palm shouted his name as the ant shot the nen at him.
Killua feebly raised his arms in front of him, focusing his nen to try and block the attack. Palm appeared before him, arms spread wide as she stood in front of him prospectively.

“Palm, no!” Killua yelled, panicked as he reached out to the woman.
Palm turned to look at him over her shoulder; and smiled. “Take care of Gon, okay?” She spoke her final words.

Killua screamed her name as the nen connected and he was sent flying again from the shockwave, skin burning from the scorching heat the ants attack produced. Killua collapsed underneath a tree feet away, ears ringing and vision swimming as he stared up in disbelief at the blue sky, just breathing.

He laid there for a few minutes, body aching terribly as his lower lip started to tremble and tears fell. If only he'd gotten up sooner, if only he'd trained Godspeed more, then none of this would have happened.

--

Gon was in much the same predicament minutes before. He had been stupid, he had let himself get distracted in the middle of a battle with the bear ant and instead of him paying the price, Kite had.

He was sitting there in the dirt, Kite's lifeless body clutched tightly to his chest as he stared blankly at the ground in front of him. There had been a massive explosion, one so powerful they had felt the shockwaves all the over there and Gon had gotten distracted wondering what it was and who was fighting it.

The bear had taken that time to lunge for him, clawed hand ready to impale him, when Kite jumped in his way and took the deadly hit for him. Gon had caught his mentor before he/she could fall to the ground. The bear had sneered at them as Gon almost instantly started crying.

He barely paid attention as the bear turned and took off running in the direction of the explosion. There was blood pooling underneath his legs, warm and sticky and sickeningly powerful in scent.

“I'm so sorry, Kite, I-I-!” Gon apologized, tears falling freely and splashing on the redhead's cheeks.
“Stop, Gon,” Kite ordered, voice soft and weak.
Gon shook his head. “It should have been me! I shouldn't have let myself get distracted, I-!”

Kite watched as Gon broke down crying, sobbing loudly, body shaking violently with emotion.
“Don't say that,” Kite spoke, eyelids drooping, blood pooling at the corners of his/her mouth and sliding down his/her cheeks. “You...have to take care of Killua...and you have...a baby boy you...need to go back to,”

Gon watched, wide eyed as Kite's eyelids fell shut, body growing limp as he/she exhaled his/her last breath. Gon continued to stare, whimpering softly. He killed Kite. Again. Gon stared at the ground in blank disbelief, unsure what to do now.

How could he do this again? How could he kill Kite a second time?! This time, he wouldn't get another chance, this time, Kite was dead and he/she wasn't coming back. Why? Why did this always happen? Was he cursed to always kill and hurt the people he cared about?!