Too Far From Texas

Chapter Twenty-Seven

"I agree, maybe the baggage comment was a bad choice of words," I continued. "But what she told me later made a lot of sense to me. She mentioned how when you and your sister were young and she was single, it was important to find someone willing to accept the fact that she was a mother. My kids and me, we're a package deal, Harry."

"I get that," he held out his arms as though to show defeat.

"As far as that bubble goes," I said, "I was happy floating along in it with you. If I'm being honest, I wasn't really worrying about my kids. That sounds shitty hearing it out loud, but it's true. It's not that I didn't care, but I was being selfish. Now..."

I hesitated, trying to find the right words. Harry fidgeted in his seat.

"Now?" he asked.

"Now that the bubble has burst, I'm scared. Like I said, it's not just you and me anymore. And it's not just the paparazzi or Jeff or your band or any of your friends. My kids are my life, and you are my life. But I don't know if..."

I trailed off again when I felt my body tremble. I started to sob, my shoulders shaking. I held my face in my hands, unable to look at Harry. I was afraid of his reaction. I couldn't face him if he decided he didn't want me anymore.

"Baby..." I heard him say. He'd leaned forward again and was rubbing my arms. "You don't know if, what?"

"If..." I sniffed. "If I can do this. I don't even know if...you want that part of me. I feel like...like I have two lives and..."

"Hey..." he cooed, pulling me by my waist. "C'mere."

He pulled me onto his lap and rubbed my back, looking up at me with those sincere eyes again. Reaching behind him on the desk, he grabbed the tissue box and handed it to me. I mumbled a thanks as I took a tissue and blew my nose.

"Baby," he said again. "You shouldn't have to feel like you're living two lives. I don't want that."

Sniffling, I kept my head down as he kissed the top of it, his arms around me making me feel safe.

"Then what do you want, Harry?" I asked quietly.

I heard him let out a short chortle before he said, "Are you serious?"

"Yes," I replied, lifting my head with tear-stained cheeks.

"I want you. I want us."

"On what terms?" I choked.

"What do you mean, Stacey? There are no terms."

He appeared to be on the verge of anger now, his brows knitted and a huge scowl on his face. I felt a sourness in my stomach like I used to get when Tod was angry with me. His arms, however, remained around me and I was reminded once again he was nothing like my ex-husband.

"Remember what I told you?" he asked. "That I don't have conditions?"

I nodded, my eyes on his chest.

"I mean that, a hundred percent. I have a crazy life, I know I do. But I also know I love you unconditionally. I'm in this for real. I want you. I want you in my life, and I wanna be in yours."

I sighed, placing my hand on his chest and raising my gaze to his beautiful face, which had now returned to the look of sincerity, though his brows were still furrowed.

"You're so young, Harry," I commented.

He rolled his eyes. "Are we going back to that again? I thought we agreed, the age thing doesn't-"

"But it does matter, Harry," I interrupted. "It matters more than we wanted to admit. When we're talking about our connection, our chemistry...no it doesn't matter at all. We make perfect sense. But when we're talking about real life..."