The Works (Affairs of the Heart)

Chapter16

Freddie's P.O.V.

After I left the hospital, I had Terry my driver come and pick me up. When I arrived at home, I was greeted by my staff. I just waved to them and began making my way towards my bedroom.I really didn't feel like talking to anyone right now, but Phoebe my assistant approaches me probably out of concern for Miami.

"Hey Freddie, how's Miami doing? Is he alright? he asked while placing his hand on my shoulder.

"Not good. He's in a coma right now. Unfortunately, I didn't get a chance to see him due to unforeseen circumstances I rather not go into."

I was looking down at the floor as I was saying this to him. I was not ready to talk to anybody about anything at this point. 

"Oh I see. I'm sorry this happened to him." He quickly pulls me into a tight hug and I embrace it because I needed it. I almost start crying, but I don't and I just hold on to him. There will be more than enough tears shed when I lock myself in my bedroom.

"Yes me too dear. Have you seen Brian by any chance,?" I asked quietly while slowly releasing myself from his embrace.

"Umm, yeah. He came in and appeared to be quite upset. Next thing I know he stormed out of here carrying his valise a little while ago. He also made several trips for other things. What the hell happen Freddie?"

"A long story is what happened dear. I can't go into right now. I have a lot of things to sort out. I'll be in my room. Let me know if anyone calls. Other than that, I don't feel like being bothered."

"Ok Freddie. I'm here if you need me, just holler is all."

"Thanks darling, I appreciate that." I muttered while slowly making my way up the stairs. I can't feel any lower than this or can I.

When I finally entered my bedroom, I literally threw myself on the bed and began sobbing in my arms. I then pulled myself up to a sitting position while slowly looking around my room. My room, Brian's room. Our room. The room we once shared. He's gone. My lover and best friend is gone. I still can't believe I let this happen. I'll never forgive myself for letting my greed override my judgement. I lost the best thing that's ever happened to me and I almost scream because it hurts so much.

I also noticed Brian has cleared out all of his closets. He's cleared out all of his dresser drawers and he's taken all of his equipment with him. Fuck... He's not coming back.

The urge is sudden. I quickly stumbled into the bathroom and I literally puke my guts out. Its probably just water and bile because I haven't eaten anything in like two days. I'm not sure what it is. But I do know I'm not going to make it through this. I mean what the hell is the point anymore. Brian was my whole world and I will always love him. And now the band is probably over. My life is essentially over. I should just get it over with and be done with this already. Everything I've worked so hard for is gone. No use in sticking around here. Nothing else matters to me if I don't have Brian and my music. So what's the point.

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Two days later...

I have not left my house since that awful day. In fact, I've never left my room. I've been lying in my bed with no real reason to get out of it except to use the wash room. Phoebe has been a great help with bringing me food and other basic necessities. But, I have no desire to eat anything or do anything at this point. Apart of me is dead. Vodka is all I need right now. It's the only thing that I want. That and Brian. I don't want anything else.

Anyway,I hope Brian is alright where ever he is because I miss him so very very much. I wish that he would come home already so we can talk and work things out. But I know that's never going to happen which only justifies my reasons for not wanting to live. But, as long as he's ok that's all I care about.

As I continue laying here sulking and wallowing in self pity, I can hear someone knocking at my door. What if its Brian. I doubt it. Although I wish it was Brian. But, its probably just Phoebe coming to see if I'm still alive so I reluctantly respond to whoever it is.

"Yes. What do you want?" I exclaimed with a hint of irritation in my voice. I struggle to sit up while adjusting myself and I feel very weak. I can barely talk, but I force myself to.

"Its Phoebe. I just wanted to let you know that John Deacon called to say that Miami is no longer in a coma and he's awake," he exclaimed while sounding muffled through the door.

"Oh. That's wonderful news," I muttered hoarsely after crying for so long. "Come in, Please," I mumbled quietly almost whispering. Phoebe comes in my room with a pitcher of ice water which I thank him for it.

"Thank you darling. My throat is so dry, I needed this."

I began straightening myself out by tying the sash on my dressing gown. Phoebe sat himself down opposite of me in my sitting chair.

"Yeah, he just called a couple of minutes ago. He said he needs you to come to the hospital as soon as possible."

"I'm not sure dear. Brian's probably going to be there. He's not interested in seeing my face after everything that's happened." I exclaimed with tears forming in my eyes. "I probably should wait a couple of days before going to see him. Right now is not the best time. Too much has happened."

I had my head down with my face buried in my hands while telling him this. He doesn't know the full extent of what happened between Brian and myself.

"Look Freddie, I would be a fool to not see that you and Brian had a falling out. And I'm sorry you're going through this. But, you can't hide in this room forever drinking yourself to death. Brian may show up at the hospital at any time. Its near impossible for you two not to run into each other. You have to do this Freddie. Miami is your friend and he needs you."

Phoebe was holding both my arms when he said this to me. Everything he said was the truth. I have to be there for Miami if nothing else.

"I know, I know Phoebe. I just need sometime to think about all of this. Perhaps straighten myself out. I mean look at me Phoebe. I look terrible. A right mess. Just leave me be for awhile. And thanks for letting me know about Miami's progress ok. You can leave now."

I didn't mean to sound so abrupt, but I have a lot to process. I need to figure out what I'm going to do next.

"Alright Freddie. Just remember what I said," he shrugged while walking out of my room.

"I will dear and thanks again."

Phoebe closed my door and I laid back down in bed. I need to figure out what I'm going to do. You know what screw it. I'm going to see my friend!

A/N..Hi guys double update 😃