Dabbling in Danger

Late Night Toke

I shake my head, bringing my fist to my face.

"I can't even think about how much I'm going to owe her parents after all this."

"Well know that I'm doing this pro bono. Diana and Rob are old friends, we grew up together. I could tell you mean a lot to Diana and Sasha, barely understood them over the phone."

I sigh with relief, "thank you Hank," is all I can think to say.

It feels like it's only been a twenty minute car ride, we pull into the driveway and stand at the door, waiting in the dark.

"Lee!" Squeals Sasha as she opens the front door.

She rushes out and embraces me, my eyes water up and I feel the sobs build up in my chest.

"Are your parents here?' Hank asks.

"Mhm," Sasha says into my shoulder, "in the kitchen."

Hank disappears inside and I let the cries shake my frame as I hold onto Sasha to stay upright.

I feel like I'm in an alternate universe. Like I woke up in someone else's nightmare and this is now my reality.

"Come on, let it out," croons my friend.

I don't know how I'm going to get through any of this but I'm glad to have Sasha by my side.

Hand in hand, we step inside and Sasha's mom calls for us. When we get in the kitchen, the lights seem too bright.

"Malina," lilts Sasha's mom. "I'm very sorry about Tiana. I wish we could do more for you."

"You've done more than enough," I wipe the wetness from my face. "Thank you for everything, I'd still be sitting in a cell if it weren't for y'all."

Sasha pulls me into a hug, "I'm so glad you're okay."

"Well know you can stay here for as long as you need to..." Sasha's mom says. "I'm sure you're tired though hun, get yourself situated and if you're hungry I'll put something together for you."

"That's okay, I don't have much of an appetite. I do want to shower though."

"Okay hun, well you know where everything is."

She smiles at me and her husband right next to her standing seven feet tall scowls at me. He never really liked me, I don't know what made me think things would be any different now. He's always thought I was a bad influence on Sasha, lucky for the both of us she's not very impressionable.

I make my way upstairs, grab a towel, Sasha gives me a shirt and pair of shorts and I close myself off in the steamy, humid bathroom.

My tears wash away with the hot water. I stare at the small white tiles that make up the walls. I can't stop myself from thinking about what could happen, what did happen. My stomach hasn't unknotted all day and I can't shake the feeling of wanting to throw up.

When I'm out of the shower, standing in Sasha's room at her closet, she walks in.

"Doing okay?" Sasha asks.

I shrug, "I guess."

"You can lay with me if you want, I don't want you to feel alone through all this."

I wipe at my cheek, "thank you," my voice is hoarse.

I don't think either of us could fall asleep though. When three-thirty comes around, the both of us taking turns squirming around throughout the night, I finally sigh and whisper her name.

"Yeah?" She answers, turning to face me.

"I'm scared."

I can tell she doesn't know what to say. Who would? Don't be scared, you're only facing a murder charge. Or.  It's alright I know how you feel. That'd be a whole lie and a half.

"Do you want to go on a ride?" She suggests after a bit of silence. "Better than lying here thinking."

"Got some bud?" I ask.

"Yes ma'am."

I may actually get some sleep.

Driving down the quiet roads, I'm sure most are asleep right now. Soaking up the last few hours before they have to clock in.

Sasha passes me the joint, I bring it to my lips and inhale deeply. The end of it glows orange, I close my eyes as the smoke wavers toward my face.

I pass it back to her and we stop at a red light.

"I'm sorry I didn't listen to you," I say.

I feel her eyes on me, "neither of us saw this coming, there's no way we knew things would escalate like this."

I shake my head, "yeah but you knew he'd get violent again... You were on the outside looking in, you saw him as he actually was..." I scoff, "right now I'm even lying to myself. I saw how he was too, I just kept ignoring it, I blinded myself."

Sasha goes at the green light. "Well maybe you're right, I think it's good that you've acknowledged it though... If you do go on trial, make sure the jury knows that too."